Chapter 421 Desire To Change
"Ahh, that…"
Noah's face fell a little, and something akin to a sad smile added to his clouded countenance.
His tale wasn't particularly a sad story. Many Adventurers in the City had more tragic experiences to share.
However, for Noah, a sixteen-year-old teenager who had been living a pretty mundane life on Earth until three months ago, his story was just as heavy.
"I think… I realized that I had no other choice but to become strong." His smile broadened as he uttered those words.
Many would agree with him, but most were probably going to miss the point. No one could really understand the depths from which he uttered those words.
People desired to get stronger for various reasons.
Some wanted wealth.
'I already have more than enough money to retire to some countryside and live the rest of my life without worrying about sustenance.'
Some craved power.
'I have enough strength to be in the one percent of humans in this world.'
Some lusted after influence.
'I find attention annoying, and most of the time… I like being left alone.'
Women.
'I don't think most of them are anything special.'
Thrill.
'Nothing about fighting Monsters thrills me. It's a dangerous job.'
Noah didn't qualify for most of the reasons why most people desired to be Adventurers. He wasn't like the average Adventurers, and he didn't relate to most of the things they valued.
Things like the ideal of freedom were lost concepts to him.
While he admired the sentiment, he found the whole thing too abstract and a little childish. In any pragmatic setting, there had to be established rules.
Restrictions molded society.
The only reason why the Adventurers were still coexisting pretty well within the City, despite the lack of solid rules and sufficient regulations, was because there were already unspoken rules that existed within the Adventurer Culture.
As much as they tried to deny this fact, it was true.
As an outsider, Noah could see patterns in their behavior which informed him that there were unwritten regulations that bound everyone together.
'That's why they're still together.'
If those rules didn't exist, or maybe the population of this city grew to an absurd degree—to the point where control became difficult—then the cracks would begin to show.
… The status-quo would crumble.
And so, the true reason Noah chose this path—despite a lot of easier options—was due to a much more primal and selfish purpose.
It was engrained within him; to the point where he could not escape or deny it.
"I wanted to change."
For a moment, there was silence in his tone.
"What?" Jet's inquisitive voice caused Noah to smile even more. Of course, no one would get it if he just said it like that.
"I used to be a very weak and cowardly person. I hid behind stronger people and always looked for ways to benefit without taking the most risks."
For the most part, he hadn't gotten rid of the latter part of his statement. He didn't think he needed to, considering how that was the hallmark of pragmatism.
Less risks, more reward.
The problem was with the former.
"I think I hated myself." Noah's solemn tone oozed through the still atmosphere.
"I had a friend before moving here. Before we became friends, I used to comfort myself by thinking he was more pathetic than I was. He was average in every way, and I always told myself—
anytime I felt shitty or sad—that at least there was one guy who was worse than me."
There was a reason Noah spoke in past tense.
"I came to realize that the guy was secretly a lot better than I realized. He was stronger, smarter… better. He was better than me, than most people around us." A little smirk formed on the boy's face.
"I liked that."
"So what happened to this friend of yours? Why did you part ways?"
Noah shrugged as he rested his back on the chair that he sat on. "I wanted to run away. That guy was a monster who wanted to keep getting strong, and I knew he would drag me with him. I wasn't ready for that."
Jet chuckled a little, and Noah did the same.
He didn't know why he was revealing so much about his past to such a stranger, but somehow… he felt like going on.
He didn't want to stop.
"I left the Capital and initially wanted to travel South, since things are a lot safer there than in the North. But apparently, all the land there has been taken."
It was no surprise, considering how most people wanted to be as far away from the war as possible. If anyone could afford it, they would instantly leave for the South.
Sure, the cost of living there was ridiculously high. Many would consider the quality of life incredibly low for the amount they were paying.
But, at the very least, they were alive.
"I decided to settle down in any quiet town close to the Adventurers City, since having Adventurers nearby would guarantee some kind of safety."
That was when Noah began his journey to the North.
"My journey was cut short when I encountered a couple of Adventurers fighting a group of Monsters." Noah remembered the entire scene as if it was just yesterday.
He had been told of a shortcut by a traveler, so he passed the route and ended up getting lost.
That was when he stumbled on the fight.
His first instinct was to hide—then the next thing that came to his mind was to run.
But… he found himself refusing to do so.
Right in front of his eyes was a Monster he knew he could defeat if he truly tried. It would be difficult and dangerous, but Noah knew he would win.
At that moment, he felt something awaken within him.
'What if… I fight that thing?'
It wouldn't cost him anything. He would probably gain some money and thanks for his efforts too.
However, that wasn't his main incentive for doing so.
Right there and then, Noah simply wanted to change who he was.
"I didn't want to be that cowering bastard anymore."
Chapter 422 Making The Change
Back then, Noah had three choices.
Stay and hide.
Run and escape.
Charge and fight.
His instinct had been to hide, and his next thought was to run as fast as he could—as far away as he could.
But… he wasn't listening.
'I-if I can win. Then… I can try, right?'
His entire being despised violence. He wasn't very strong too, and his Skills were mostly useful for evasion and defense.
Yet… why did he want to fight?
'Ahh…' He realized it at that moment. '… Is this your doing, Rey?'
Noah realized how dissatisfied he felt—with himself, and with the scene playing out in front of him.
He had felt this way throughout his journey away from the Capital.
Despite that gnawing feeling, he constantly told himself that he made the right choice leaving his only friend behind so he could run away from responsibility.
However, when he stood there, hidden from everything in the world, Noah was finally able to confront himself.
'I don't like this… this version of me.'
The time he had the most fun, and felt most fulfilled, was when he was pretending to be some kind of powerful subordinate of Ralyks.
He liked the way people looked at him. Their respect, admiration, their fear… it made him feel warm inside.
It wasn't even like he sought their validation.
He wanted his own.
"So, I decided to fight." Noah shrugged smiled, narrating the experience as if it was no big deal.
He stealthily charged at the first Monster and gave his all into generating the perfect surprise attacks.
He used all the Skills in his arsenal to fight, and he pushed himself a lot more than he ever had.
"Faster."
He hastened his movements.
"Stronger."
He strengthened his muscles and increased his force.
"Smarter."
He read the Monsters and came up with perfect counters at the spot.
"Better!"
He repeated the process—over and over again—until he ended up killing all the adversaries.
"I changed a bit of myself that day. I was able to become a little like the man I pretended to be." Noah laughed as he began to conclude his story.
"After seeing the Adventurers in action, I realized my original perception of them was a little too generous. If I could defeat Monsters that Adventurers couldn't, then it was possible for me to become an Adventurer."
He followed the Adventurers back, and after the joint testimony of the people he saved, there was no need for him to even take a Test.
Noah had become an Adventurer, registered as Sherlock.
"The rest is history. I joined one of the most influential Parties, managed to defeat the leader, and became the leader myself."
In more ways than one, Noah changed. He found himself trying out new things, exploring everything he previously ran away from.
"Day after day, I keep changing in hopes that one day… I will become like that ideal image I pretended to embody."
"The errand boy of your friend?"
"Well… no, not that part." Noah laughed out loud once he heard that comparison. Jet's words weren't wrong, but they didn't properly embody what he strived to be.
"I want to be a better human being. Someone stronger, smarter, better than I used to be."
He wanted to be like his friend.
"Sorry for the long story, but that's pretty much it."
*********
'The hell…?'
Rey was shocked by how much Noah had matured as a person. 'So his change was a lot more than what I saw on the surface.'
In a way, he felt a bit intimidated.
As happy as Rey felt for Noah and his personal growth, he couldn't help but feel challenged in a sense. Perhaps he didn't want to get left behind, or he felt like he wasn't as mature as his friend was.
Rey didn't understand it himself, but he felt a tinge of envy.
'I guess this is pretty normal. Still…'
People wanted their friends to do well. However, no one wished for their friends to do better than them.
It was human nature, and Rey was the embodiment of that principle.
"I'm happy you were able to change. That was a pretty inspiring story." He said, meaning every word of it.
Yet, something about his tone rang hollow.
"Thank you. I would have loved to ask why you became an Adventurer, but it's gotten pretty late and I don't want to take up too much of your time."
"Ah, how right you are." Rey responded, laughing in his gentlemanly tone. "I enjoyed every moment of it, though."
"Likewise. Still, I would feel guilty if I kept you any longer than I already have."
The parties from both sides rose to their feet, and Rey ended up shaking Noah once again. He also watched as Noah shook Esme—a little too much, in his honest opinion.
"You'll have to leave without me, Jet and Lux. I need to have a discussion with the owner of this establishment."
"I understand, Sherlock."
After exchanging pleasantries for the last time that night, Rey parted ways with Noah and left the pub with Esme trailing behind him.
The moment they exited the place, the first thing that caught Rey's eyes was the group of Adventurers who were kowtowing close to the pub's entrance.
'The heck?!' Rey instantly recognized them as Sango and his five stooges.
'How long have they been waiting here in that position?'
It was already pretty dark outside, and there were no Adventurers in sight—probably due to being chased off by Noah's Party.
Rey couldn't imagine it being very comfortable for them to maintain such a posture for very long, but since they were Adventurers, perhaps it wasn't as bad as he imagined it.
Still…
"WE ARE VERY SORRY FOR DISRESPECTING YOU!" All of them yelled at the top of their lungs.
It caused him to stifle a chuckle.
'Noah has gotten pretty harsh. To think he'd make his subordinates to this just to appease me.'
This was yet another change that amazed Rey.
Chapter 423 Confessions Beneath The Moonlight
"Shouldn't you be in a hurry? You have to pick up some people, right?"
Esme's voice echoed in Rey's ears as they neared their Inn. Despite hearing it, Rey hardly reacted or changed the steady pace at which he walked.
"It's fine." He simply responded. "I sent a Duplicate a while back."
"R-really? I didn't notice!" Esme expressed surprise, to which Rey chuckled and shrugged.
"Yeah. I did it pretty quickly. Hid it well too."
With his wide array of Skills, it wasn't a difficult thing to do. In any case, the only reason he was able to talk to Noah for so long despite his busy schedule was due to that arrangement.
"I wanted to pick them up myself, but I guess plans change." He smiled softly, shrugging again.
Something about the atmosphere felt moody for some reason. Rey didn't even know why, but he suddenly felt a lull within him.
Perhaps a moment of silence was what he needed.
"Friend of yours?" Unfortunately, Esme wouldn't let him have that.
"Yeah. You could say that."
Rey didn't think he treated Noah as well as he should have treated a friend, but he genuinely considered him one.
After all, he was the first and only person who he revealed his secret to.
"Has he seen your face behind the mask?" Esme's question made Rey laugh a little.
He replied still.
"For him, and the people we had in common, the mask was my secret."
It was pretty ironic how the opposite was true for Esme. Regardless, he could say that Noah was the only one who knew both sides pretty well.
'Back then, I didn't think Ralyks would up playing such a big role. If I had known that, would I still have exposed my identity to him?'
Rey wasn't sure. All he knew was that Noah was incredibly useful at the time, and it would have been difficult to achieve the things he was able to without his help.
Difficult, not impossible.
"And you're sure your secret is safe with him?"Esme probed even more.
"You met him. What do you think?"
"I think he talks too much." Her response was blunt, but the smile on her face showed fondness towards that kind of behavior.
Rey noticed that, but he chose to ignore it completely.
"I don't think he'll spill my secret. Besides, I could always compel him to forget it."
"Really? Then why didn't you just do it back then? It would have been the safest bet, right?" It felt like Esme was driving at something, but Rey wasn't in the mood for it.
And so, he ignored the subtexts that existed underneath her words.ƒrēewebnoѵёl.cσm
"There's no need to go that far. I plan on coming clean to the rest of my friends once this entire Dungeon thing is resolved."
"Really? What does that have to do with this situation, though?"
"The only reason I care about my identity being exposed is because I don't want them—no, her—to think negatively of me." Rey sighed, finally stopping in his tracks.
The moon's dim glow did a poor job at capturing his face, but thankfully the nearby lights that decorated the city were able to shine their light on it.
He appeared tired.
"I think I've had enough of the secrets. It's also going to get problematic explaining why Ralyks won't participate in the war despite his power."
"You mean 'your' power."
"You know what I mean…" Rey sighed in exasperation, to which Esme just chuckled at.
"In any case, it'll be better for everyone if I just told them the truth. I don't want to limit my strength on the front lines where actual lives are at stake."
He could see Esme nodding and smiling at him, so he quickly added something else. "That doesn't mean I'll show you my face, though."
"C-come on!"
"Pfft! You look cute when you pout like that." Rey teased.
"Well, I can't say the same about you since I DON'T EVEN KNOW what you look like."
"I know I won't be cute." Rey shrugged. "So there's no need to say it."
Esme sighed, obviously very deflated after hearing what Rey said. She clearly didn't want to push too much, and Rey really liked that.
"So the friend he was talking about, that was you, right?" As usual, Esme changed the topic to something more comfortable to talk about.
Rey didn't know how she was so skilled at conversing, but he liked that aspect of her as well.
"Yeah. I was really surprised, to be honest." He laughed slightly, staring high into the starless sky. "I didn't think I made such a strong impression on him."
"…"
Esme chose to remain silent, allowing Rey to soak in the quietness around him. It allowed him to think really clearly.
"I really wanted to tell him, you know? I wanted to tell him that I was Rey, his friend from back then…"
"So why didn't you?"
As her soft, barely audible answer danced in his ears, Rey parted his lips and let words accompany the cool mist that proceeded out.
"I… He looked happy. He looks like he's growing nicely, and this new life suits him. I think… if I showed up like this—out of the blue—it might sort of ruin that."
"I see…"
"Yeah…"
The both of them remained still, Rey looking at the blank sky while Esme stared at him with glistening eyes.
They stood there in silence for an unknown period of time.
But, someone finally spoke.
"He likes you, you know? Noah…" Rey slightly glanced at Esme as he muttered those words.
"I know."
Herresponse was brief, accompanied by a light shrug and a knowing smile.
"And?"
"And what?"
"Do you like him back?" These words followed each other in quick succession, but after this question, there was a long pause.
"Do you like Britta?"
"Huh? What does that have to do with the question I asked?"
"I mean, she likes you."
"Does she? I don't think so."
"Sure… keep saying that."
"Just answer my question." Rey said, slightly raising his voice.
He didn't realize this, but his cheeks were a little red as he stared intensely at Esme's clear blue eyes.
However, rather than answering honestly—as she normally would—the Half Elf pulled back, placing both hands behind as she playfully walked away.
"H-he—!"
"I'll tell you when you show me what's hidden underneath that mask."
*