"When it comes to antidotes—the antidote for a mixed potion is greater than the sum of the antidotes for each individual ingredient. I believe this concept isn't difficult for you to grasp—"
"The challenge lies in how to select the additional components for the mixed antidote and use the dual-balance ratio method to calculate the proportions of each ingredient—"
Snape spoke eloquently, while Jane Yu listened intently, utterly absorbed.
Various cauldrons of different materials surrounded them.
"Of course, you should still remember what I said three years ago— bezoars found in a goat's stomach can counteract many poisons."
"Do you have any questions about this?"
Jane Yu glanced down at the textbook Snape had handed her. Next to a long list of antidotes, someone had scrawled in messy handwriting:
Just shove a bezoar down the throat.
The textbook had many sections blacked out and annotated with additional notes, clearly chronicling the somewhat eccentric history of a former Potions professor.
But she did have questions—
"The composition of a bezoar may include food residues, husks, wood chips, sand... If it's to be used as a universal antidote, would its composition affect its efficacy?"
"And would adding a bezoar to any antidote enhance its effectiveness?"
Snape fell into deep thought, even pausing the exclusive magical PowerPoint he used for teaching.
He couldn't answer the question immediately!
"This hasn't been tested," he replied slowly. "Bezoars are quite rare..."
What he didn't expect was—
The next morning, he was awakened by the sound of loud "baaing."
His diligent student, Jane Yu, stood at his door holding an entire goat, blinking her innocent black eyes and saying:
"Professor, I'd like to conduct an experiment to find out?"
All thanks to Aberforth's generous sponsorship!
Upon hearing about her dilemma, he had promptly sent over a goat!
Unfortunately, Aberforth, busy managing the queue of guardians at the Hog's Head, hadn't considered the ecosystem of Spinner's End.
Snape's brain.exe temporarily crashed.
But thanks to the eight Nifflers from before, he now found the goat somewhat... tolerable.
Besides, he was also curious about whether the bezoar's composition would affect its efficacy.
All in the name of potion research, of course.
Brain rebooted successfully.
Snape swiftly snatched the book on the shelf that was dangerously close to the goat's mouth and warned:
"If that creature sets one hoof inside this house, its meat will end up in your brass cauldron."
One week later.
"I think we've confirmed that the different compositions of bezoars only cause slight variations in antidote efficacy—"
After conducting experiments, the teacher-student duo reached a conclusion. But soon, his student posed another question:
"What about gallstones from a cow's stomach? Have you heard of ox bezoars? Or ox gallstones?"
"Or the lining of a chicken's gizzard? Perhaps it could be useful in digestive potions?"
Once again, Snape fell into deep thought.
He felt as though a new train of thought had been unlocked.
But when he was awakened by the "mooing" of a cow and the "clucking" of chickens, he realized things were getting out of hand!
To accommodate the goat, he had already set up a small yard around his house and cast numerous Muggle-Repelling Charms...
But seeing chickens running around and a cow slowly chewing on fodder, he felt this was simply too much.
"Allow me to remind you once again, Miss Yu, this is Spinner's End, not your farm—"
"If I see any new animals here again, I guarantee they'll end up on our breakfast table."
Was she trying to open a zoo in his home?
He even felt that Newt Scamander's suitcase didn't have as diverse a collection as his yard!
This must be Dumbledore's way of tormenting him!
And Scamander... why did he indulge Jane Yu's obsession with all things fluffy?
Mentally, Snape added a few more tallies to the grudges he held against two Dumbledores and one Scamander.
The next day.
Awakened by birdsong, Snape stormed into his living room—
He was determined to see what outrageous stunt Jane Yu had pulled this time!
However, his fury dissipated when he found himself face-to-face with a phoenix.
"Uh... I don't think this one can end up in our breakfast... can it?"
Holding Fawkes, Jane Yu lifted the phoenix slightly as if to make her point. Fawkes had a large bag of seeds in its beak.
Snape's face turned as dark as coal. Gritting his teeth, he enunciated each word:
"Albus... Dumbledore... Get his bird out of my house!"
His warning finally took effect.
This was evident when Jane Yu stopped bringing back new animals and instead started bringing back new plants.
Things like Chinese Biting Cabbage... Shrinking Figs... Bubbling Beans... Parasol Mushrooms... soon filled his yard.
And they quickly made their way onto their dining table.
Snape took a vicious bite out of a piece of Chinese Biting Cabbage, chewing it as though it were Jane Yu herself.
In his thirty-four years of life, he had never known that Chinese Biting Cabbage... or Stirring Parasol Mushrooms... when stir-fried over high heat...
—could actually taste quite good.
Jane Yu, having successfully improved their meals, smiled faintly, hiding her achievements and reputation.
Her temporary guardian might have been a master of potions, but judging by the taste of his potions, he had little regard for culinary flavors.
After a week of nothing but oatmeal, bread, tomatoes, and tea, her taste buds felt utterly abused.
She had thought Hogwarts' food was the pinnacle of bad cuisine, but Snape's meals shattered that perception.
Granted, with his precision and talent for potion-making, the food was impeccably prepared—oatmeal perfectly dehulled and cooked at just the right temperature; bread and tomatoes toasted to perfection, neither a second more nor less.
But none of that changed the fact that it was bland and tasteless.
Fortunately, after some effort, she managed to procure milk, goat milk, eggs, chicken meat, and a variety of fresh vegetables like cabbage, mushrooms, and beans.
With a balanced diet of meat, eggs, dairy, carbs, vegetables, fungi, and legumes, she was now well-nourished.
And her temporary guardian, Snape, had gone from casting disapproving glances to reluctantly accepting... and eventually to showing satisfaction and encouragement?
He even concocted a special fertilizer for the Chinese Biting Cabbage, making them bite even more enthusiastically.
Professor Sprout would surely be delighted to hear about this.
What she didn't know was—
Far away at Grimmauld Place, Sirius Black was wailing under the care of his beloved godson:
"That damned greasy bat! Ow... it hurts..."
"Who on earth... Ow... uses Biting Cabbage... Ow... as a decorative plant?!"
"Argh—Greasy bat! Greasy git! He's absolutely insufferable!"
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