"The hospital cafeteria served sushi for lunch today!"
The picture, taken by Sakura on her phone, showed three girls clearly worn out, the physical check-up hadn't been easy—but they all smiled for the camera.
Despite Sakura's message sounding like they were going to feast and get their money's worth, there was only one lonely piece of sushi on each of their plates.
Sushi had a rich, red cut of fish that looked incredibly fresh even in the photo.
Beside that, each of them had a bowl of plain rice porridge, the kind usually reserved for people who are sick in Japan.
Still, the warabi mochi in front of Shouko looked pretty good. If Kyousuke had gone with them, he probably would've settled for that to fill up.
The message was sent at noon.
Now, it was already 3:30 PM.
Based on past experience, their check-ups should be done, and they'd be entering the consultation phase with the doctor.
Kyousuke had already turned off the projector and switched on the TV, settling into his daily ritual—watching NHK.
One hand kept reaching into the potato chips, feeding his mouth automatically while his eyes stared blankly.
Look closely and you'd see there was no focus in them. His attempt to distract himself with boring TV and suppress his anxious wait had failed.
[Tokyo Medical University Health Screening Center]
Just like last time, once the tests were over, the nurse politely asked which of the three would like to hear the results first.
Even if they came together, privacy was still to be respected.
However, she faintly remembered how, during their last visit, that ridiculously handsome guy had instantly brushed off her question and they all went in together.
Now, seeing that today's patients were the same trio of beautiful girls.
The nurse—who had since gone through two more boyfriends—was instantly reminded of that visit two years ago.
How could she ever forget a guy like that?
But why hadn't he come this time?
She'd even given up her own shift and promised to buy coffee tomorrow just to be the one to escort "Kyousuke-san's group."
Still, she figured they'd probably go in together again.
"I'll go first this time," Sakura said, turning to look at Shouko and Naoka.
The three had already changed back into their regular clothes, and Sakura had slung her blue school backpack over her shoulders.
"Huh? We're not going in together?" Shouko blinked, surprised.
"Hey, even with the people closest to you, a girl needs to have her secrets, you know, Shou-chan."
"A woman without mystery drops in charm like that!" Sakura said with mock seriousness.
Shouko's eyes widened slightly. "Really?"
"Of course! Even though Kyousuke and I are childhood friends, I've got tons of secrets. That's why we've always gotten along so well."
"A woman with no secrets will just end up being cast aside!"
She emphasized her words, clearly trying to spook her.
"T-Then…" Shouko thought back to last night when she'd nervously asked Kyousuke if he thought she'd gained weight.
Then she remembered Sakura's natural ease around him and their casual banter that morning.
Her heart sank.
No wonder Sakura didn't want Kyousuke to come with us.
"Don't listen to Sakura's nonsense," Naoka said, rolling her eyes.
Sakura loved teasing Shouko—and Shouko, poor thing, always fell for it.
"Just go already. Shouko and I'll wait for you in the lounge."
"Ehehe~" Sakura flashed a mischievous grin, proud of herself as she strolled into the consultation room.
"Good afternoon, Yamauchi-san. I'm Dr. Tanaka Kaneishi…"
"Afternoon, Doctor."
Sakura casually glanced around the office.
The couch had changed color, and Dr. Tanaka's hair looked thinner. Was that why he wasn't giving his explanation on the couch like last time?
Following his gesture, she sat across from his desk.
Four monitors were set up on the desk.
Two were showing what looked like CT scans, one was full of data she couldn't understand, and one was turned off.
There were even two keyboards.
'Whoa, he's this old and can still handle all this tech like a pro?' Sakura was quietly impressed.
Some people go blank when they're nervous.
Some get overwhelmed with chaotic thoughts.
And others—like Sakura—find their minds becoming hyperactive, buzzing with thoughts like popcorn kernels exploding.
One moment she was thinking about the sushi she ate at lunch, the next she was wondering which lip gloss she should use for the new school semester.
It might count as a kind of mental chaos, sure—but it worked for her.
Even though she was desperate to know the results, she didn't blurt it out like Kyousuke had done last time.
"Yamauchi-san," Dr. Tanaka said cautiously. "Your results… weren't ideal. I'm wondering if you'd like to have a family member present to hear the explanation?"
This part of the consultation came with an additional fee—10,000 yen, no haggling. But Dr. Tanaka still tried to be gentle.
It was like someone hit a rewind button.
All the thoughts that had scattered like dandelion seeds suddenly zipped back, reassembling in her sharp, clever mind.
Sakura exhaled deeply.
Strangely enough, the anxiety she'd felt earlier completely vanished. She pressed her lips together and gave a calm, serene smile.
Dr. Tanaka prepared himself for a wave of emotions—screaming, sobbing, shouting—his ears bracing for impact.
He already had the usual lines ready to go: "Stay calm," "Take a breath," "It's not the end of the world yet."
People who came to this hospital feared one thing above all: cancer. The hospital's services, the costs, the reputation—it all pointed in one direction.
Sakura had imagined that if this moment ever came, she'd feel like a seal caught in the claws of a polar bear, her heart torn to shreds in an instant, her remains sinking into a deep ocean of cold and darkness.
But that didn't happen. Not at all.
When she heard those words, what she felt instead was a bizarre sense of relief.
She turned to look out the window.
It wasn't open—probably to keep papers from flying out.
The sky stretched endlessly above.
Sky upon sky, blue upon blue.
The deeper she looked, the more oppressive that endless blue became. Still, it looked perfect for a nap.
But Kyousuke was probably wide awake right now, pacing nervously, anxiously awaiting her results.
'Maybe he's more scared than I am.'
'Maybe he took all my fear onto himself—that's why I don't feel afraid.'
'How unfair! This kind of experience… it's as rare and precious as high school itself.'
"Yamauchi-san?" Dr. Tanaka prompted gently.
"Ah—sorry, I spaced out," Sakura replied, turning back.
Some people, when overwhelmed, mentally block out bad news as a defense mechanism.
Dr. Tanaka considered that possibility—this girl did look far too cheerful, as if nothing had happened. But ultimately, he didn't think that was the case.
"Dr. Tanaka, you can just tell me straight."
'I'm practically at marriage age, you know. I can handle it.'
If it had been her family demanding the truth be hidden, he would've explained the patient's right to know.
But since she herself had asked directly, he nodded and proceeded carefully.
"Based on the tests, our preliminary diagnosis is early-stage pancreatic cancer. There's still a small chance of error, but... it's unlikely."
Tanaka Kinseki held up the CT scan, pointing to various parts as he explained.
The whole situation felt a little surreal, this was the first time he'd seen someone react so calmly to a cancer diagnosis.
Most people, especially young ones, would be in denial, yelling things like "This can't be real!" or "I'm too young for this!" or begging, "It must be a mistake!"
"...I strongly recommend notifying your family as soon as possible so you can begin further tests and treatment."
"Mm, I will. Thank you, doctor." Sakura gave a polite nod, then unzipped her backpack and carefully tucked away all the test reports.
"Your condition was caught very early," Tanaka added. "The success rate for surgery is extremely high. Try not to stress too much, staying positive is crucial for recovery."
"I understand. Thanks again, doctor."
'Of course I'll stay positive.'
'Even if not just for myself—actually, especially for myself. I deserve to be happy.'
She zipped her bag and stood up—but immediately collapsed back into the chair.
'Huh?'
'Where did my legs go?'
Startled, Sakura looked down.
Her legs were still there, attached like normal—but they felt completely numb. She could barely feel them.
She gave one a pinch. There was some sensation, but faint.
'Okay, what the hell? I mean, fine, I don't exactly know where the pancreas is, but I'm pretty damn sure it's not in my legs.'
'You're not seriously telling me it's already spread down there, are you? That's just plain mean.'
"Miss Yamauchi, would you like me to call your friends?" Tanaka asked gently.
"No!" Sakura snapped, still busy scolding her own legs in her head.
"Doctor Tanaka, please keep my condition strictly confidential."
"That includes the two girls waiting outside—and especially Kyousuke, who scheduled the appointments. None of them can know."
Suddenly, her legs seemed to remember how to stand. Sakura got to her feet, voice steady, gaze firm.
"You can trust me on that," Tanaka said. "We take patient privacy very seriously. We've all sworn the Hippocratic Oath, and your confidentiality is our responsibility. It's why people trust us."
"If Kyousuke asks about my results, please just tell him everything came back normal."
She didn't mention the report itself, she knew the hospital wouldn't release it to anyone without her explicit permission.
"Understood," Tanaka said, nodding.
He could see why she wanted to hide it. It was precisely for situations like this that medical ethics held confidentiality as sacred.
"And don't forget—this is an early-stage diagnosis. At our hospital, the success rate for this kind of surgery is essentially zero failure. But it's crucial that you move quickly."
"Haha, don't worry. I happen to like being alive. I'll talk to my parents tomorrow and get the surgery scheduled. Thank you, Doctor."
She turned to leave.
But on her very first step, she nearly stumbled again.
These legs—legs she'd trained since she was a kid, legs that had carried her through sixteen years of life—were shaking uncontrollably.
"Shall I call a nurse to assist you?" Tanaka offered, concerned.
"No, thank you."
Sakura declined firmly.
If she couldn't even handle this moment, there was no way she'd fool Kyousuke.
Heck, even Shouko would know something was up.
A part of her wanted to call her parents right now, tell them everything, beg them to come pick her up.
But she couldn't.
Kyousuke would figure it out immediately.
Tanaka didn't press further and quietly stepped back behind his desk.
'What are you so afraid of?' Sakura asked herself.
'Of dying, obviously,' another voice inside her replied.
'What's there to be afraid of? Anyone on this planet could die in the next second. Should they all live in fear, too?'
'In fact,' the voice continued, 'compared to those blindly wasting time, unaware of their mortality, aren't you lucky?'
''You can actually see death. You can savor every moment of being alive. You won't take your time for granted.'
'Some people don't even meet the person they love before they die.'
'But you? You've found someone. If you died tomorrow, there's someone who would cry until they passed out—and grieve for a hundred years.'
'Now that's something to be proud of.'
And with that thought, the trembling stopped.
That inner Sakura, the one who could stare down death with a smirk, gave her a thumbs-up.
'Heh. Of course. I'm not some coward like Kyousuke.'
But… was Kyousuke really a coward?
She pictured him last night, lying on the grass, too afraid to fall asleep—and smiled softly.
"Don't forget to keep it a secret, okay, Doctor?" she said cheerfully, turning back with a wink.
"Don't worry. I have ethics."
Tanaka couldn't help but smile, even though he knew he probably shouldn't.
Normally, doctors had to maintain a serious demeanor in front of patients facing a life-threatening illness.
But Sakura's bright smile was so disarmingly genuine that even his trained professionalism faltered.
"3Q~~!" she called out playfully, waving as she stepped out of the office.
The smile froze on Tanaka's face as the door shut.
'Why must someone like that—with so much life—have to fade away at such a beautiful age?'
'But that's exactly why medicine exists.'
The words echoed in his mind, Professor Chino's speech from their medical school entrance ceremony.
Tanaka had only pursued medicine to climb the social ladder, but that single speech shook him to his core.
Even now, years later, that line remained etched in his memory.
———————————————————————
"Ah, Sakura's out," said Shouko softly in the waiting room, glancing up from her phone.
"Was that Kyousuke?" Sakura asked with a grin, taking the phone from her.
"Heeeyyy~~" she said, drawing out the greeting.
"How'd it go?" Kyousuke asked immediately, same as he had after the last check-up.
"Perfectly fine," Sakura chirped. "The doctor said I'm just a bit underweight, so I need to eat more nutritious food. Y'know, like grilled meat and stuff."
On the other end of the call, Kyousuke finally let out the breath he'd been holding. Everything was fine.
If it weren't, Sakura would've already broken down in tears, she was terrible at hiding that kind of thing.
"You liar, Kyousuke!" she will suddenly pouted into the phone.
"You said as long as I ate healthy and exercised, I'd be fine! Do you have any idea how many tasty things I skipped over the years because of that stupid advice?!"
"Yeah, that's exactly what she'd say."
But just for today, maybe they could indulge a little. Consider it a celebration of her clean bill of health.
"You want to have a barbecue tonight?"
"Eh? Really? We can?" Sakura's eyes widened in delight as she asked.
"If you want, I'll start prepping now. We can do a BBQ in the yard tonight," Kyousuke replied with a warm smile.
"Yes, yes! Let's do it! And not just beef—I want offal too!" Sakura added.
Kyousuke had always hated eating organ meats, ever since he was a kid.
Honestly, that made him kind of a weird Japanese.
Even that French-style family restaurant they went to yesterday had "pork innards" listed as the daily special.
"Alright, I'll head out now and get everything."
"Go for it, go for it. We'll be back before 8. Shouko has to go in for her check-up, and I'll give her phone back then," Sakura said cheerfully.
"If you don't feel like going out, I can bring the groceries back myself," Shouko offered kindly, well aware that someone was a bit of a homebody.
"It's fine. I'll treat it as a nice little walk."
"Okay, see you back at home then."
"I'll be waiting."
After hanging up the phone, Shouko looked at Sakura.
"You feeling okay?"
Naoka glanced at her too.
Despite all their daily bickering, they were best friends through and through.
"Yep! Totally fine!" Sakura answered casually.
"Alright then, I'll go hear what the doctor has to say," Shouko said with a gentle smile after hearing her reassuring reply.
"Cool, cool. I actually wanna go buy something. Let's meet at the north gate of Shinjuku Gyoen later, okay?"
As if remembering something important, Sakura quickly said.
"Want us to come with you?" Naoka offered.
"No need, no need. See you guys later~" Sakura waved as she said goodbye to them.
Once she left the hospital, she got her bearings and walked toward the subway station.
JR Akihabara Station — as soon as Sakura stepped out of the station, a wave of heat hit her.
Compared to the quietness of Bunkyo during the holidays, this place was packed.
No surprise really—most of the students were probably hanging around here now.
It wasn't her first time visiting.
She'd come before with a senior from middle school, even went to a maid café together and ate omurice that had been blessed with "delicious magic."
But compared to back then, the feelings that stirred in her as she looked at the girls standing along the sidewalk in cute dresses were very different.
She didn't know if those girls who didn't look much older than her—were here to buy makeup, get a new phone, or maybe start part-time jobs.
But none of that mattered to her anymore.
Those kinds of worries were a thing of the past for Yamauchi Sakura.
From now on, every day of her life could be spent with Kyousuke.
No fear of being abandoned, no worries about getting sick, no anxiety over mortgages.
All that was left for her was happiness.
Still, a part of her felt guilty.
Kyousuke only became so terrified of death… because of her.
He was the kind of guy who could calmly reassure her and Aunt Mikiko even after falling and getting injured, carefully using a needle to pick gravel out of a wound.
The kind of boy who, in third grade, stood alone against over ten classmates…
How could someone like that be less deserving of life than people wandering the streets, not even knowing what they live for?
Of course not.
Yamauchi Sakura had always known Kyousuke wasn't afraid of death itself. He was afraid of what death meant.
Because it would mean that the girl named Yamauchi Sakura would vanish from his world forever.
That truth had made his fear of death grow clearer, deeper.
She didn't know when he first learned she would die from pancreatic disease, but he must've lived in fear all those years.
Just thinking about it made her wonder… 'Maybe it would've been better if we had never met.'
But that wouldn't do.
Happiness and death almost seemed like synonyms.
Maybe true, flawless happiness meant death itself.
If you reached that kind of happiness, maybe love would quietly fade away.
The phrase "All who meet must part. One life, one encounter"—that's what it really meant.
If you die while you're still together, then you never have to suffer the pain of parting.
No wonder the Titanic had to hit that iceberg!
Philosopher Sakura gave herself another mental thumbs up as she looked around for her target.
She had come here to find a somewhat shady advertising agency, one that could help her subtly edit her medical report—adjust the values between two separate checkups, turn abnormal results into normal ones, tweak the numbers just a little.
———————————————————————
Meanwhile, back at the testing center.
When Shouko reached the door, a nurse informed her that the doctor was on a call and asked her to wait a moment.
"Yes, Miss Yamauchi's in good health. Malnutrition? No, we found no signs of that either," said Dr. Tanaka Kinseki seriously over the phone.
"We'd need the patient's consent to release the medical report. Sharing it would violate privacy laws."
"Understood. Thank you, doctor." Kyousuke let out a deep breath after hanging up.