The carriage ride was what I had thought it would be. Uneventful. But halfway through the ride. We stopped and decided that since we were far from the little city.
City…city…ci-CAT!! WHISKERS!!?
I shot right up from my sleepy daze and shook my head, making the carriage shake, which alerted the guards outside. The carriage stopped moving, which means the horses stopped. The guards' heavy footsteps could be heard stepping off the driver's seat. Stopping next to the door. They opened it and were startled by how tense the atmosphere was.
I didn't care and instead chewed on my nails. Worried for the little furry creature that supposed to be my new friend…
My head snapped over to the guards. My pupils shaking. I barely found my voice. But it sounds foreign to my own ears.
"My cat. Bring me my cat."
Judging by their stiffness and sweat dripping down their foreheads I still strike fear into them.
The one that was definitely older and looked like he wanted to retire.
Well too damn bad.
I don't want to be here either, Gerald!!!
If that wretched father wants me back, then I shall be back with difficulty. After all I didn't ask to be here so why am I the one being punished?!
Argh!!! Why, mother, why?!
I screamed in my head. Cursing out any gods or goddesses that made this man be my father. But in reality, I was just staring blankly at the guard.
Making him nervous and fidgety. It was obvious in his body demeanor. How his eyes are shifting back and forth. To me than his colleague.
To drive my point further, I raised my brow. My expression is not pleasant.
"Are you willing to speak or are we waiting here till the sun is done?"
He froze up again before speaking
"Well, your highness…we…we didn't see a cat…"
His words tentatively. He takes a deep breath and quickly gathers his mind. He still thinks I haven't changed.
Well, it was supposed to be that way. I don't think it would be any good if word got out that I have been brought back by one of the goddesses.
Anyways back to the guard who clearly said his piece, but I wasn't paying attention.
Huh?
I looked at the guard who I remember, his name is Gerald. His peers, superiors and even the emperor said he looked like a racoon with how dark his under-bags were.
Gerald the racoon knight was his name. He tried to correct and even get rid of the nickname but soon after, he embraced it. Now he somehow proudly wears the nickname.
That or he just is too tired to deal with the name and decided that it was futile to change what people say and think.
He speaks again; voice rough. "Your highness" He repeated, capturing my full attention. "We didn't see a cat. Perhaps it ran off during the whole ordeal.
I sighed and nodded. I was too caught up in my thoughts to notice whiskers jumping out of my grip. It made sense.
Why didn't I think of that. Maybe I should put a missing poster. I was good at drawing in my previous life. Ah right, my skills have been reset. So that means my handwriting and drawing will not be that great. Oh well. I'm rich so I could hire someone to get this underway.
I sighed and waved him away. My expression was somber as I had already planned out the cat's life at the palace. I sat back down and signaled to them to start the journey once again.
It was just the flick of my hand. I heard them shuffle away and the carriage moved. The weight added. The reins let out a snap. The horses started to move.
We traveled the remaining distance. It's a wonder how I even went this far to the village.
Did my sheer willingness to get out of that horrible palace really that strong? Wow...
But I was caught, not even a full day out…
I crossed my arms and looked at the flooring of the carriage. Pouting. Wondering.
Till the view of the walls that surrounded the capital came into view. Those stone walls that remain cleaned.
As if it was washed daily. The plants being spread out and being exclusive flowers. Ones that came from the southern Hemisphere Taking months to arrive. Only the imperial family or granddukes could buy it.
But the reason they're adore among the capital walls was because of my mother's bleeding heart. She was too kind. Way too kind for this cruel world. I heard multiple stories.
She personally went to the poor and gave them coins. Dalduns. And even some of her own things. Wanting the people to be comfortable. Since being around the poor for most of the time and staying out late. It caused her to get pneumonia. And being pregnant puts her at risk.
As I mentioned, she passed away when she gave birth. The illness making her weaker and succumb to death.
Truly pitiful.
I wonder if my mother was never that kind and instead took priority to her health.
Will she have lived.
Making father like me.
Think of me as his daughter instead of someone that shared his blood and nothing more.
I truly wonder.
The houses and stores passed through my gaze. I saw the passerbyers stop and look at the carriage. Right. The carriage is obviously a signal that an imperial family member is passing through. I brushed it off and instead looked back ahead.
Last time I ever stepped out was for a tea party that I was invited to, but I was humiliated. Then suddenly they went bankrupt and stripped of their title. I heard in my last life that the girl had to travel and be adopted because her family didn't want her to suffer,
Truly a wonder. Even a family that terrible and arrogant but still doesn't want their children to suffer a life of poverty and so forth. Would my father have done that?
Definitely for Arabella he would. But she would still be rich regardless because people have paid her for simply looking at her.
Pretty privilege is truly a feat that is wanted simply for the benefits. No wonder girls are putting so much pressure on themselves and envy every other girl.
It took quite a while to get to the palace. Maybe thirty to eighty minutes, roughly. And since it was the palace, the guards standing by the gates had to thoroughly confirm the identity of every other individual.
Guess that means father is getting scared. He does have a lot of enemies like the emperor. And from him past.
The maids gossiped about fathers' past lovers somehow being the cause for mother death. But it doesn't seem logical.
She died of childbirth because she was sick with pneumonia. How would the past lovers even make someone sick.
Oh well. Not likes it my problem. I must plan my next escape. I don't want to be here.
The carriage carried on pass the entrance gate. Not even stopping to check identification of us. That unexpected. Surely, they were ordered too but why not us?
My question was answered when I saw a familiar figure.
It was Arabella, her waist-length wavy ombre hair flowing in the wind, her glasses catching the glare of the sun. her bangs just below her bangs her thin eyebrows. Bangs styled up and being centered down the middle.
The sun hitting her tanned skin being hit perfectly. Her floor length dress was not puffy as she usually wore. But rather being two layers. Her dress and her shawl.
It was a pretty shade of blue. Flowers were embroidered on the ends of her dress. It was white flowers. My birth month flowers were snowdrops.
I felt my heart clenched.
Why is she wearing my flower?
The carriage stopped in front of her. Her attendant rushed forward and opened the carriage door. But before I could comprehend what happened. Arabella was in front of me in an instant.
Wrapping her arms around me and pulling me tightly against her chest.
"Amaya!"
She cried. It took a minute before she pulled away. When she did, I noticed she had eye bags and looked tired. But her eyes were puffy. And looked she was recently done crying.
Instead of hugging her back, I sat there frozen. Unsure what to do with unexpected affection. What was it that people did. Hug them back, was it?
I tentatively wrapped my arms around her. It was foreign. The sister that pretended that I was invisible and not someone to even talk to as the flower and only princess of the empire. She was hugging me.
I felt her stiffen but she soon relaxed again. Hugging me tighter. As if telling me it will all be alright and that I can be vulnerable to her.
"Amaya… you're safe…"
She pulled away after a minute passed. Her expression was not that warm or soft anymore. Her brows pinched together as she frowned at me.
"Amaya! Do you know how worried I was?! I didn't know if you were dead or alive! Cold or sick!"
She yelled. I never heard her like this. She was obviously mad, but I know there was concern. I could tell. She was shaking. Either with anger or just on the verge of crying. Her waterline was filling up with tears.
"I had to organize a search for you! I was that worried!"
She organized the guards to search for m…me…? It wasn't that bas...bastard?!
I felt my eyes widen. My thoughts racing and repeating the same line. It was possible but why did it hurt. Was I secretly hoping that the emperor would notice and try to find me. That he was worried that I was possibly injured, probably cold on the streets. Was I secretly hoping for him to lose sleep over me…
But deep down, passed my hope for that stupid father to worry. I knew he would never be concerned or do everything in his power to find me or even put people's head on the guillotine.
He would only do for Arabella.
That much was clear. Afterall, she didn't kill mother. It was me.
All me.
I am my downfall. Gods. I feel disgusted. Wishing, I could crawl out of my skin and be a different person.
Be someone different that didn't have to live with the guilt that everything that had happened to me was because of me.
Was I cursed?
Am I really just someone who was a curse?
Guess father was right. I do destroy everything and cause everyone harm…
Arabella must've noticed I was spacing out because she didn't do anything other than grabbed my hand softly and pulling me up. Since I was three to almost four years younger. She could still pick me up. So, she decided to. She bent down slightly, wrapping her arms around my back. She jumped me up so she could better hold me without straining herself. When she felt how light I was. Her eyes looking at mine in concern.
"Amaya… are you eating well?"
She walked off the carriage, her attendant looking at Arabella like she wasn't supposed to touch me, much less hold me.
Right… the flower should only experience the best, not touching rejects that hold no influence whatsoever.
Arabelle must've noticed because one minute, the attendant looked at me like I was less than dirt. Then the attendant stiffens up and looked away. Obviously scared by the way her hands folded together tightly.
Arabelle turn to me again.
"Amaya. Answer my question. Are you eating. And don't tell me lies."
Her words sharp and obviously holding little patience.
I tense up, trying to think of an excuse but the look she had told me to tell the truth or else. I sighed and just told the truth.
"I try… but the maids and chefs give me small portions… saying that I don't… de...serve it..."
I felt her hold getting tighter, the atmosphere turning tense. She looked ahead; her expression blank. I could tell she was getting mad. But why…
Arabella was always a mystery I couldn't figure out no matter how many times I tried to. As she was nice. She was just as scary.
She took a deep breath before turning to her attendant. Her eyes narrowed.
"Tell the head chef to prepare a five-course meal of Amaya's favorite food and dessert. Or else."
That put the attendant in a difficult position because she didn't know anything about me but she bowed either way and ran off.
I learned one thing today.
Arabella de Freia Luxien is scary when she desires to be.