Accordingly, after the delicious BBQ, Sally began to wield and refine her innate gift, [Intuition of the Ice Queen] with purpose and artistry, appraising various persons and scenarios with breathtaking insight and skill, and causing her to gain increasing mastery and presence in diplomatic and high-stakes situations. At the same time, this would allow her to gain increasing insight into the motivations and overall quality of any potential suitors...
___
Meanwhile, two figures were seated in the dark room. A candle was burning dimly, and by its weak sputtering glow, one could make out the outline of a person who was writing feverishly at a desk. Every now and again, there was a glint of metal - his hands were chained!
Another masked man sat opposite him on a bed, perusing a manuscript, which read: "Hairy Pee and the Power Stones"...
"Uh, this candle is kind of aesthetic, but can we turn on the lights? Otherwise it's gonna be hard to see what I'm doing." The speaker chained to the desk, Zhang Lu, spoke up.
"Hmm... Yeah All right." The second man, Itvasme Diogenes, reluctantly agreed. He did love dark things, as he felt it fit his villainous image, but even he needed light to read.
___
As the fluorescent lights went on, Itvasme could see that, on the desk were various writing outlines, the fruits of Zhang's labours.
"Hairy Pee and the Power Stones"
"Hairy Pee and the Chamber of Secretions"
"Hairy Pee and the Rizzioner from Azka Bangs Dumbbell's Door."
"Hairy Pee and The Goblet of Rizz"
"Hairy Pee and the Order of the McDonald"
"Hairy Pee and the Half-hearted Rinse"
"Hairy Pee and the Dated Marshmallows"
Itvasme chuckled. It was promising indeed... very promising...
___
It had been the ultimate betrayal.
The Goblet of Rizz was there, shining on the bedside table in Mykrumvilgo's room, filled with shining, magical Rizz essence. Whoever drank from the cup would immediately have their Rizz Index immensely increased, ascending from the pits of Pathetic Peter to Consummate Chad. As such, this Goblet was highly sought after - and as he read on, Itvasme had now reached another... 'climax' in the story, where Hairy and Ronnie had discovered that possibly, it had been because of this Goblet of Rizz that Krum had managed to charm Hermyne to his side, and as such, they had confronted the Bulgarian superspunk over it.
Hairy and Mykrumvilgo were now duking it out over the Goblet so that they could better woo the pretty and smart Hermyne, and at this point, Krum was on top, pulling Hairy's... hair, whilst Hairy flailed around, gripping his rod - his Rizzard's wand - tightly, until in a burst of... ac-cumulated effort, Hairy had finally managed to turn the tables, scrabbling and at last gaining a purchase on Krum's slick, girthy magic stick and finally turning aside the cursed energy that spewed forth from this paragraph.
Hairy and Ronnie had gone way back, when they had become friends. No.
They had become More than Friends...
Brothers... they became sworn brothers guys... come on... 😛✨
Hairy had considered Ronnie his sworn brother for life, but at the crucial moment, as he was locked in a... heated joust of passion with Mykrumvilgo, Ronnie… had betrayed him.
At this critical juncture, as Hairy and Krum had feverishly duelled with their wands, Ronnie, whom Hairy had expected to have his back, instead had stabbed it, opportunistically chiming in and guzzling down the Goblet of Rizz!!! Ronnie had laughed in triumph whilst Hairy and Krum stopped mid-tumble, their wands crossed, with looks of utter shock and despair...
___
The purpose of Itvasme's plans for Zhang Lu were simple.
He wanted Zhang Lu to romanticize Dark Rizzardry. Make toxic, normal. To desensitise people to antisocial and manipulative behaviors, so that the Dark Rizzards could more easily achieve their goals.
In fact Zhang Lu was no ordinary writer. He had in fact crafted a secret author identity, and published books under the pseudonym, J.K. Imzhang.
Itvasme had been informed about the popularity and potential in this JK Imzhang's writing, and had via his various networks, had quickly tracked him down. His aim was to convince him to change the plot in exchange for Power Stones and Chapter Unlocks. If need be, there would even be the possibility of a Comeic, Animu adaptations, movie rights, the works!!!
"Zhang Lu… I've read Hairy Pee and the Power Stones. It has potential."
"But I want you to make Hairy turn... Dark."
At this, he unwrapped a dark chocolate and offered it to him. Itvasme loved the bitter taste, which invigorated him.
"Dark like chocolate."
"Dark as in Dark Rizzard..."
___
Zhang had accepted the task, whilst Itvasme looked on with an expression of approval - although this couldn't be seen since he was still wearing his mask.
Zhang Lu had immense talent and a wide readership, if he wrote about the excellence of Dark Rizzardry, the Dark Rizzards could take over the world indirectly, through soft influence!
Very well, Zhang thought to himself. He had been paid to write, and write he would!
He would craft a story… of Hairy Pee, the Dark Rizzard!!! and transform his readers into believers...
___
The massive man raked his hands through his grizzly hair which was currently in a hairnet. He was sporting a ponytail, tattoos, and rode a Harley Davidson. Indeed, it was Hairgrid, the biker king, here to assess promising new talents into the School of Magic and Rizzardry.
"So, Hairy… I heard abou' Ronnie and Hermyne..."
Hairgrid consoled. "But I'm afrai' the School doesn't accept those who are at Pathetic Peter level...
"I'm sorry."
As the big biker rode off into the distance, Hairy punched his soft pillow (which barely indented).
"Why was he so weak?! Why?"
Hairy grit his teeth. He was left with no other option.
He tossed his glasses to the ground, and tried to crunch them under his foot, but failed as he lacked the strength.
Currently, he also lacked the intelligence as shown by this strange self-sabotaging action.
Even so, this act filled him with a savage satisfaction, offset by the minor drawback of everything suddenly looking blurry and him becoming kind of legally blind.
But never fear! He quickly got his eyes lasered, which also filled him with laser focus.
He was going to be cool. He was going to become… edgy!!!!!
Hairy began to meticulously read and study his newly discovered favourite novel, Reverend Unsanitary, aiming to reforge his nerdish persona into one of power.
"Rizz... is power." Hairy whispered, as he tossed his teddy bear into the trash.
There was no going back!!!
___
Amidst the fever that was Zhang Lu's writing madness, the world was also abuzz with news - that a premier event had just been announced.
Indeed, it was the World Ball - a special opportunity where everyone who was anyone would socialise, make connections, and showcase their credentials to the world...