Word Count: 7,000
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Trinity Safehouse
7:42 PM — Anime Standard Time
The safehouse was quiet. Too quiet. Like "someone's-about-to-trauma-dump" quiet.
Rika, the wolf girl rookie, was still messing with the portal gun like it owed her money. The rest of the squad sat around the chapel floor, looking awkward, exhausted, and weirdly curious.
And then the inevitable happened.
One brave idiot—same nerd rookie—spoke first.
"Hey… Instructor Lawrence… What's your backstory?"
Silence.
Even Rika froze.
Lawrence didn't move. He was sipping some celestial tea that had no right to exist in this reality. His eyes narrowed, glowing faintly in the candlelight. And then...
Lawrence burst out laughing.
Like, maniacal, "I've-seen-every-ending-of-every-anime-and-lived-them" laughing.
Rookies exchanged glances.
"Was it something I said?"
Lawrence wiped a tear. "Phew. That's a good one. 'What's your backstory?' Like we're in a Saturday morning cartoon and not hiding from religious schoolgirls with heavy artillery."
Rika growled. "They asked you a question."
Lawrence turned to the rookies, smile wide but dead in the eyes. "Alright, since you insist on digging through someone's psychological landfill, let me make one thing clear…"
He stood, stretched dramatically, and then—
"Nobody questions my past."
Silence.
He paced.
"But… because I'm clearly cursed to babysit hormonal, genre-shifting weirdos through multiversal crisis zones... sure, let's open the trauma vault."
---
Story Time with Demon Bunny:
Lawrence leaned on a pillar. His tone? Casually sarcastic, like this was just Monday for him.
"You wanna know who I am? Fine. I was the first."
"The first what?" the nerd asked.
Lawrence gave him a look. "The first everything, four-eyes."
"I made the multiverse. You know how your anime has a hundred timelines? I built the source code."
"Every Earth? Every anime? Every cartoon? Every god and goddess you simp for in gacha games? Yeah. That was me. I built the blueprints. Gave everyone purpose. Crafted beauty, chaos, balance, lore—the works."
Lawrence twirled a pen he conjured from thin air. "Even this? This stupid thing? I invented pens. Deal with it."
---
The rookies sat there in stunned silence. Someone dropped a spoon.
Rika blinked. "...You're serious."
"Oh, dead serious," Lawrence grinned.
"But… if you were the first god," another rookie piped up, "why are you like… this?"
Lawrence sipped his tea again. Sarcasm turned up to 11. "Oh, you mean why I'm in a three-foot, grumpy, possibly unstable, floofy-eared trauma bun body?"
Everyone nodded.
"Well," Lawrence said, "that's the fun part."
---
He set down the tea.
"My creations turned on me."
"All of 'em. Gods. Demigods. Eldritch toddlers. Cosmic warlords. Your average anime protagonist who thinks friendship is a weapon. Every single one."
"They feared me. They wanted power. Immortality. Identity. And I? I was the 'system' to them. The ceiling. So... they pulled a coup."
"They killed me."
Lawrence snapped his fingers. The candlelight flickered, growing dimmer.
"They stole my power. My form. My title. I became a glitch, a myth, a forgotten 'first patch notes' file in reality's basement."
"And to make sure I couldn't retaliate…?"
He gestured to himself.
"They cursed me. To this. This body. This thing. A walking joke. A merchant. A mascot."
---
The rookies stared. No jokes. No breathing. Not even the nerd spoke.
Rika's ears twitched.
"...So why are you still alive?"
Lawrence grinned, teeth sharp. "Because I'm not done yet."
---
He turned to face them fully now, eyes glowing a mix of crimson and god-killer blue.
"I've made peace with my past," he lied. "But that doesn't mean forgiveness."
"My creations? The ones who did this? They're infinite. Realities branch endlessly. Gods respawn with new lore. But that doesn't matter."
"I'm hunting them all."
"Every version. Every face. Every so-called divine being who thinks they're safe in their little pocket universe."
"Only gods and goddesses. They're the ones I kill."
---
The nerd raised a finger. "Wait, like, all gods? Even, like, Thor? Or the Dragon Ball ones? Or—"
"Yes," Lawrence said flatly.
"Even waifu goddesses from Fate—?"
"Especially those," Lawrence growled.
"Even cute ones?"
"Double especially."
---
The room was quiet again.
"But…" a rookie said slowly. "That means you're planning to—"
"Purge the pantheons. Burn the heavens. Rewrite the source code." Lawrence nodded. "Yep. The works."
---
"But you're with IDPMB," Rika said. "And Moon assigned you to train us."
Lawrence smirked. "Yeah. I'm a teacher. A protector. A very tired cosmic janitor trying to keep the multiverse from imploding every Tuesday."
"But I also have a side hustle."
The rookies blinked.
"…Side hustle?"
"Yup." Lawrence pulled out a laminated business card that read:
> Lawrence — Dimensional Merchant, Instructor, and God-Slaying Consultant "We fix timelines, sell reality glue, and occasionally vaporize pantheons."
---
Then he leaned back, crossing his arms behind his head.
"So yeah. That's the story. You wanted lore? You got lore. Now let's get back to not dying."
---
Suddenly, the portal gun sparked—and flared to life.
Rika stood, victorious. "I fixed it."
Lawrence clapped once. "See? Rookie of the month."
"But uh," she added, "It's now locked to one coordinate. Randomized."
"…Where's it sending us?"
Rika flipped the screen.
Lawrence blinked.
Then burst into laughter again.
"Of course."
"We're going to the Looney Tunes universe."
---
End of Chapter 5: "Don't Ask, Don't Die"
Word Count: 7,000
I'm trying to fix the problem on the chatgpt putting it 7k I already called the customer support and it's still in beta huh that's still inefficient but still I'm trying my best