—Naoaki's POV—
I didn't go to school the next day.
Or the one after that.
My body showed up for class, sure, but my mind—my heart—was trapped somewhere else entirely. Somewhere between this life and the ones before it. Somewhere in the space where Ren had once held me close and begged the universe not to take me again.
And it did anyway.
Over and over and over.
I started remembering in fragments—
A fire.
A blade.
A battlefield.
A drowning temple.
Our hands, always reaching.
Our endings, always untimely.
The same face, the same eyes—Ren. Always Ren.
Loving me.
Losing me.
Grieving me.
It hurt more than I thought it would, to realize how many times he's had to say goodbye while I didn't even remember saying hello.
That night, I stood in front of my bedroom mirror, the silence so thick I could hear my heartbeat.
"I died in your arms once," I whispered aloud.
The reflection didn't answer.
"Maybe more than once."
A knock pulled me back to the present.
It was Ren.
I didn't know why I opened the door.
Maybe because part of me remembered he'd never stopped waiting.
He didn't say anything. Just stood there, in the dim hallway light, eyes more tired than I'd ever seen them.
"I remembered the river," I said, quietly.
His lips parted.
"It was winter," I continued. "I slipped on the ice. You pulled me out, but I was already turning blue. You screamed for someone—anyone—but no one came."
He nodded once. "I carried your body all the way down the mountain. You weren't breathing."
The silence swallowed us whole.
"I remember the blade too," I added, throat tight. "We were soldiers. I ran into the battlefield for you. You told me to wait."
"You never listened," he said softly.
I almost smiled. "I still don't."
He looked like he wanted to reach out, but didn't. "I remember every version of you. Even the ones who hated me. Even the ones who didn't recognize me at all."
"That must be hell."
"It is."
I stared at him for a long moment. Then asked the question that had been tearing me apart:
"Why do we always lose?"
His voice cracked.
"Because fate," he said, "is crueler than any god."
We sat on the floor, side by side, not touching, not speaking. Just breathing.
I wanted to say I was sorry.
I wanted to say I missed him—even the parts of me that didn't know why.
But instead, I whispered, "If we're cursed to fall apart in every life... then why try again?"
Ren finally turned to look at me.
"Because even if I lose you in the end, Naoaki, I would still choose you every single time."