Juliet was pretty sure it was burning the rice that started the whole thing.
But it wasn't because she didn't know how to cook. It was literally the one thing she could do without a recipe. However, Juliet was convinced her landlord hated her.
He turned the gas line off while I was boiling my rice! Juliet thought bitterly.
She stared at the appliances inside her meager kitchen: the old reliable gas stove (now rendered useless), the slightly moody oven (occasionally made amazing meals), an enthusiastic fridge (that froze almost everything she put in it, including soda) a dented electric kettle, and a "new" (from a secondhand shop) microwave.
She was hungry now and her oven had to preheat, so that was out. "I guess it'll be you and me today, kettle." Juliet grabbed a dish towel and polished it up a little bit, until she saw her black hair in its usual no-nonsense ponytail.
She smiled at her reflection, despite her bitter feelings toward her landlord.
Then glared at the scorched pot, which smelled like poverty and betrayal. "Perfect," she muttered. "Extra crispy rice. I'm surprised Mom didn't get up from her grave to scold me."
She took a fork and carefully scraped as much rice as she could without scratching the bottom of the pan and dumped it into a chipped soup bowl.
"Okay microwave, do your thing."
She entered "2:00" and spent that time scrolling through videos on her phone and looked forward to leaning against the tiny counter while waiting for her salvaged rice with a cup of coffee.
"I wish my life would change. Even just a little."
Her apartment was tiny enough as it was--and Juliet didn't want to overfill it with her regrets.
Unfortunately, the gods decided to test her once again because the microwave didn't start.
"Huh? Don't tell me I bought a broken microwave..." She opened the appliance and saw the walls were a little damp.
"What?"
She grabbed a dish towel and started to wipe it down. "I swear this rice is more trouble than it's--agh!"
Juliet felt a slight prickle on her hand, like a kitten was teething on it. She leaned in for a closer look and--
CHOMP!
A mimic swallowed her whole. It burped and, now empty, continued its life pretending to be a microwave.
Before she blacked out, the last thing Juliet saw was...her rice, screaming as they fell into space.
+
Juliet woke up in a diner booth. The seat was upholstered in galaxy print, and the table felt like real wood. It was faintly warm and smelled like cinnamon banana bread.
Outside the window were stars. Endless, spinning, hungry stars.
She was more confused than ever, but in awe at her present surroundings. Inside, there were red leather stools and booths in soft glowing hues. Walking around were waitresses that looked like they walked out of a 1950s catalog and injected with starlight.
One of them leaned over Juliet, pen behind her ear and holding a clipboard covered in strange, looping handwriting.
"Name?" the waitress asked.
Juliet blinked. "Where… am I?"
"Oh, great," the waitress sighed. "Another slow one."
She clicked her pen and wrote "Wild Card" on the form. As the waitress finished writing, a pop-up screen appeared in front of Juliet.
[SYSTEM INITIALIZING...]
Welcome, [Wild Card!]
You have been chosen as a contestant in the 999th Annual Cosmic Cook-Off!
Objective: Appease the Great Hunger through culinary trials.Reward: One wish.Penalty for failure: Digestion for you and your planet.
+
Juliet bolted upright. "Hold on. 'Digestion?' In the...metaphorical sense?"
"Not even slightly," the waitress said. "First-timers get a warm-up round. Kitchen's in the back. Don't forget your soul thread."
"My what now?"
A glowing string hovered in front of her chest. It pulsed like a heartbeat, then zipped toward the swinging doors marked 'PRACTICE STATION – NEWBIES ONLY.'
The waitress pushed a menu into Juliet's hands.
It read:
TRIAL 1 – COMFORT FOODObjective: Recreate a nostalgic dish that will momentarily soothe the Great Hunger.Ingredient Crate Provided. Time Limit: 10 Minutes.Flavor Bonus: If the meal makes the judge cry (positively).Warning: Sentient ingredients may scream. Please wear gloves.
+
The practice kitchen was a cathedral of chaos. It was also in a huge arena surrounded by an audience.
A pot stirred itself angrily in the corner. Meanwhile, there were three whisks trying to escape from their drawer. She walked until her soul thread stopped at a station with her name on it. "JULIET. WILD CARD FROM EARTH."
She tried to open her fridge and something inside it hissed. On her table was an ingredient crate. Opening it, she found:
A packet of instant noodles
A chicken hotdog that whimpered whenever she touched it
A ghostly spice jar labeled "Mom's Love" (with a tag that said 'Say something nice about yourself to open')
A single olive
And a note:
"Sometimes you can make it tasty by adding a thing or two."—Mom
+
Juliet stared at the assortment in front of her. They looked perfectly normal, save for the whimpering chicken hotdog. When her eyes rested on the instant noodle packet, her stomach growled.
Besides being a budget-friendly ingredient, it was the starting point of her interest in cooking.
A memory bubbled up just then, of her mother standing over a hot plate in their first apartment. She was slicing a single hotdog into coins while little Juliet waited excitedly.
"See Juliet, if we add these hotdogs into the noodles, then it'll taste even better." She clearly remembered the red cookie jar flecked with gold, safe on the countertop against the kitchen backsplash.
Juliet's mother always sprinkled a special spice from the cookie jar--inherited from her mother.
"Remember Juliet," her mother said as she dropped the hotdogs and her special spice into the pot. "to everything you make, add a dash of love."
She started to cook, dark brown eyes slightly wet.
Juliet dropped the noodle block into a simmering pot of mystery broth. While it was boiling, she whispered an apology to the hotdog and sliced it. The spice jar gave her some trouble, but after Juliet complimented her own hair, it finally opened with a giggle.
She stirred gently, like her mother did.
While she cooked, she heard snippets of conversation from the audience above.
"Is she really going to make a delicious dish with those trash-tier ingredients?"
"I feel sorry for the Earth, really..."
Their whispers disappeared as the air thickened with memory.
The soup shimmered like gleaming amber and Juliet thought she might actually have a chance.
The door behind her opened.
A being of light and shadow—The Hunger--entered. He resembled a handsome man with blonde hair and piercing aqua eyes. The Hunger also looked incredibly tired. He slouched and let out a sigh that rattled the cutlery.
"Whenever you're ready," he said, and her very blood ran cold.
Juliet placed the bowl in front of it.
"Seasoned instant noodles with chicken hotdog and my memory."
The Hunger took one sip. "Mmm."
And stopped.
The entire diner held its breath.
A single tear fell from his crimson eyes and hissed when it hit the counter.
[SYSTEM UPDATE]
Dish Accepted.Flavor Rating: 2.7Emotional Resonance: 8.9Title Earned:Memory Noodle Girl
"Let's see what rating he gave it," the waitress murmured as she tugged on Juliet's soul thread. As soon as she did, there was a gentle ping! and the results were projected to the audience on a large screen.
Juliet was dumbfounded as the audience cheered.
The waitress gave her a slow nod.
"Well," she said. "Not bad for a Wild Card."
Juliet exhaled, shoulders trembling with relief.
Then the ceiling split again and a brand-new screen popped up in front of her.
[RANK-UP CHALLENGE: SCREAMING INGREDIENTS ONLY. PLEASE SIGN WAVER.]
Bonus Reward for Emotional Pacification.Penalty: Immediate Disqualification. You and your planet will be turned into meatball soup and devoured.
Juliet looked up, wide-eyed.
"…I just got here!"
A tomato rolled into the room, sobbing.
Just as she was about to ask, the doors in front of her opened. She saw an even bigger audience and heard the confident voice of a host say,
"Welcome, Wild Card, to the deadliest cooking competition in the multiverse!"