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The Lazy Concubine: The Gruff General Dotes on Her Daily

IceBlood
7
chs / week
The average realized release rate over the past 30 days is 7 chs / week.
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Synopsis
In her previous life, Wen Wan died suddenly from overwork. Reborn as the concubine of a top-ranking general, she swore off hustle culture entirely. While the general was off at war for three years, she lay around like a salted fish the whole time—free, idle, and utterly content. That is, until the Old Madam had a nightmare in which the general died on the battlefield with no heir to his name. Determined to secure the family line, the Old Madam ordered the main wife to take two concubines with her to the frontier to, quite literally, breed. On the way, Wen Wan and the main wife were separated during a bandit attack—and she ended up being rescued by a young junior officer. Unfortunately, that officer and his hundred-man unit were soon surrounded atop a mountain by an enemy force of three thousand. With a blade at her throat, the young officer said coldly, “Better to die swiftly by my hand than be captured, defiled, and tortured to death.” Wen Wan: Thank you, honestly! What a kind guy you are! Braving her fear, she spoke up timidly, “I know a thing or two about outnumbered tactics… want to give it a try?” Thus, the hundred-man squad fought their way out and became legends on the battlefield. When warhorses began mysteriously dying in the camp, Wen Wan wrote an essay titled “Postpartum Care for Military Horses”—doubling the cavalry's horse population within a year. Later, after successfully flirting her way into the young officer’s heart, she made a bold promise: “Just you wait. I’ll go home, divorce that husband of mine, and come back with his money to support you. You’ll live like a god!” Only to discover... the husband she wanted to divorce was that very same young officer. The general gave a half-smile. “I heard… you were planning to divorce me?” Wen Wan: “…”
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Chapter 1 - Bearing an Heir for the General

The General's Estate had been holding ritual ceremonies for seven days straight.

It all started because the Old Madam had a nightmare—she dreamed that the Great General died on the battlefield, leaving behind not a single heir to perform his last rites.

After conducting the rites, the Taoist priest left behind a cryptic message before departing:

"When Yin and Yang are in harmony, the root of trouble is severed."

The Old Madam pondered this for three full days but still couldn't figure out what he meant.

Wen Wan, meanwhile, was cracking sunflower seeds when her maidservant mentioned it. She couldn't help but burst out laughing.

"'Yin and Yang in harmony'? Isn't that just a polite way of telling the Old Madam to send women to the frontier so the general can father a child?"

The maid suddenly understood, and when she whispered this interpretation to the Old Madam in secret, she was rewarded with two taels of silver.

And so, the seventeen or eighteen women in the rear courtyard who belonged to the general all started scheming, swarming around the main wife in hopes of being selected for the golden opportunity to bear the general's child.

Only Wen Wan stayed exactly as she was—eating until full, sleeping until noon, drinking, and playing mahjong. She lived as carefree as a salted fish basking in the sun.

In her past life, she had worked herself to death—literally. After reincarnating as a concubine of the Great General, all she wanted was to lie flat and opt out of the rat race.

No 996 work schedule, no last-place eliminations, no performance evaluations. She had good food, good drinks, and no need to suck up to any boss.

This life was every overworked corporate drone's dream come true.

So when it came to something like childbirth—high risk, low reward—whoever wanted to go could go. She sure wasn't interested.

Unfortunately, the General's main wife, Madam Zhao, was no fool. The more eager the other women were, the more she distrusted them. In the end, her attention fell on the most indifferent one: Wen Wan.

Wen Wan: "…"

Why was the boss lady not playing by the rules?

Left with no choice, Wen Wan packed her bags and set out for the frontier with another concubine, Chun Niang, under Madam Zhao's lead.

The journey, which should've taken a month, was dragged out to a month and a half due to Madam Zhao's delicate upbringing—she was a noble lady unaccustomed to the rigors of travel and kept stopping to rest.

Along with them traveled over a dozen strong guards from the estate.

As night fell, the group found lodging in a small village along the post road.

There was only one inn in the village. With a wave of her hand, Madam Zhao, backed by her wealthy family, rented out a secluded courtyard at the rear.

Wen Wan and Chun Niang shared a room. They had barely fallen asleep when the sound of drums and gongs erupted outside the inn.

"Mountain bandits! The bandits are here!"

Screams and the clamor of gongs pierced the night, chilling to the bone.

Chun Niang broke down crying, clutching her blanket and trembling.

Wen Wan was scared too, but despite her fear, she crept to the window and cracked it open for a peek.

One glance—and she gasped sharply.

A guard who'd been dining with them earlier had just had his head cleaved off by a charging bandit.

The bandits were already inside. If they didn't run now, they'd be dead!

Wen Wan yanked her head back and grabbed Chun Niang by the arm, dragging her toward the back window.

She had just shoved Chun Niang out when the room's door was kicked open.

Two bandits, each wielding long blades, stormed in. Upon seeing Wen Wan, their eyes lit up.

"Well, well! A delicate little beauty!"

"Today's our lucky day. This inn is crawling with fine goods. Even those young lads outside will fetch a good price!"

"Cut the chatter. Tie her up and bring her out!"

Hearing their exchange, Wen Wan relaxed—just a bit.

As long as they weren't killing her on the spot, she still had a chance to escape.

To avoid unnecessary suffering, she quickly raised her hands and cheerfully said, "Big brothers, please tie me up gently. I'll cooperate."

The two bandits, seasoned in robbery and murder, were taken aback. In all their years, they'd never encountered a girl who didn't scream or struggle—just calmly offered herself up to be tied. Their expressions grew puzzled.

Was this little lady… simple-minded?

"The idiot" Wen Wan had her hands bound and was dragged to the front room of the inn.

The large hall was packed with fifty to sixty vicious-looking bandits, all surrounding their captives like wolves around sheep.

Wen Wan was shoved forward, stumbling until she nearly toppled onto a young man.

Thankfully, she thought, at least there's a meat cushion to break my fall.

But just as she fell, the human cushion took a step back.

Without that buffer, Wen Wan landed flat on her backside. Pain shot up her tailbone.

Grimacing, she looked up at the jerk who didn't catch her—and locked eyes with a pair of deep, strikingly handsome eyes.

Whoa. This guy's gorgeous.

He was tall and well-built, with sharp brows and bright eyes. Though dressed in the coarse garb of a village laborer, the rolled sleeves revealed strong arms and calves. His open collar showed sun-bronzed skin and taut, muscular lines.

Wen Wan had been caged in the inner courtyard for three years. Though she'd never lacked food or comfort, her spiritual life was utterly barren.

She sorely missed the days of modern internet when she could thirst over handsome men with a few clicks.

It had been far, far too long since she'd seen someone this perfectly aligned with her aesthetic tastes.

Perhaps her gaze was too blatant—because the young man frowned and shot her a look of disgust.

"Uh…" Wen Wan belatedly realized she had crossed a line and quickly looked away, face burning.

Among the captured, she didn't see Madam Zhao.

Most likely, as the head wife, Zhao had been protected by all the guards during the ambush and managed to escape.

The bandits began interrogating each captive one by one.

One literate bandit was in charge of recording information—names, ages, and backgrounds. If a captive had moneyed relatives, they would send a ransom note. If not, they'd be sold to the tribes beyond the border as slaves.

Wen Wan had been given as a "gift" to the General's Estate as a concubine. It was unlikely they'd pay much to get her back. And being sold beyond the frontier meant escaping would be much harder.

After a moment's thought, Wen Wan fabricated her story.

"My name is Zhao Xiaowan. My husband is Zhou Millionaire from South Street in Linqiu City. He's rich and adores me dearly. He'll definitely pay the ransom."

There really was a merchant named Zhou Millionaire on South Street. Chun Niang had mentioned him during idle chatter.

Wen Wan figured, as long as she escaped before the ransom letter was sent, the lie wouldn't be exposed.

"Oh, from Zhou Millionaire's family? No wonder there were skilled guards at this inn."

The bandit didn't doubt her. Only wealthy households could afford guards of that caliber. And her fine silk clothing matched her claim.

She passed inspection, and Wen Wan secretly let out a sigh of relief.

Next, it was the handsome young man's turn to report.

"A-Chai. Twenty-four. I've got a brother in business who can pay the ransom…"

Not only good-looking—but his voice sounds amazing, too.

What a pity… another prisoner like herself.

Half an hour later, the bandits separated the captives. Those worth ransoming were loaded into a large cart.

Wen Wan was the last to board. Scanning the available spots, she instinctively chose the seat next to A-Chai.

His expression darkened. He immediately shifted away.

Wen Wan: "…"

Was it really that serious? Just a few glances and he was treating her like a pervert? What a blow to her self-esteem!