[The Day of the Second Foreign Language (German) Exam]
Shiro sat leisurely at his desk, watching the foreign professor at the front. His cheat sheet was already placed on his desk—transparent and perfectly hidden behind his arm, invisible to anyone!
Sitting in the middle-back row, he silently observed everyone around him, reviving his childhood hobby of studying human behavior.
Most people looked nervous and uneasy, like the honest guy Fujiwara, who had already started shaking his leg...
Of course, there were some who looked very confident—but Shiro found this group a bit strange.
They seemed to fall into two clear types: the honor student type like Chisa, and the delinquent-looking guys you'd expect to be skipping class.
Since when did delinquents get good at German? Are they planning to study abroad in Germany or something?
"Alright, first, please put your pencil cases away."
Before Shiro could think any further, the foreign professor announced one of the exam rules, instantly crushing Mitarai's hopes.
From Shiro's vantage point, he clearly saw Mitarai's face go from full color to grayscale.
Shiro shook his head, silently mourning for the friend he hadn't even known for that long.
Sitting next to Mitarai, Yamamoto proudly flaunted his own cheat sheet. He had already guessed the pencil case trick wouldn't work. As expected, in times of crisis, you could count on him!
"And no eating or drinking—please put your beverages away too."
Bang.
Once again, Shiro witnessed another soul turn to monochrome…
Left with no options, the two could only look to the rest of their group for help with pleading eyes.
Iori and the others quietly looked away. Helping others now would be suicide.
Shiro also looked away.
Out of the eight two had already lost their competitive edge. He had to seize this chance to crush them!
Though, easier said than done...
He looked down at his cheat sheet and the exam paper… he couldn't understand a thing! He couldn't even make out what the questions were asking!
In terms of German, he was probably even worse than those idiots. At least they attended class now and then. Shiro hadn't listened at all! He'd treated German class like naptime.
With a gloomy expression, Shiro set his pen down. Though it was shameful, he decided to observe the others again.
He casually slid his cheat sheet into the second page of the exam.
Iori and the rest were just too timid—there was only one proctor, so he could've easily laid it out and copied slowly.
Shiro the cheat master had used this exact tactic in his past life—it worked like a charm!
ヾ(=?▽?=)?
The foreign professor checked his watch. "Alright, the exam starts now. If you finish early, you may leave."
BAM!
As soon as he said that, two of the previously calm-looking delinquent students stood up and shouted, "We're done! Leaving!"
"…"
(???)
That was way too fast! So their calm expressions were actually just the face of people prepared to die!
Yep. This school was totally full of delinquents. How did these people even make it to university...?
Shiro, Iori, and Kohei sat in a triangle formation. Shiro was behind the other two. This situation was beyond what one person could solve!
"Kitahara, Kohei, can you guys understand any of this?"
Shiro muttered quietly, once again bemoaning how slack the supervision was. If he could understand the questions, he'd easily ace the test!
"I got a few, but that's nowhere near enough!"
"Let's ask Nojima!"
The three looked toward Nojima. He was the only one among them who wore glasses—surely he was the smartest of the group!
"I… I can't see… can't see clearly…"
(???)
The trio turned away as Nojima struggled to read through a cheat sheet shoved under his sweaty arm.
What an idiot! Of course it'd be soaked in sweat in this heat!
Buzz buzz buzz~
Just then, a phone buzzed from inside Iori's pocket.
Under Shiro's shocked gaze, Iori casually pulled out his phone and checked a text.
Shiro almost turned him in right then and there! If this guy could use his phone in an exam, why had they all been sneaking around like fools?
"What is it?"
Kohei asked, completely unfazed by the fact that someone was using their phone during a test.
Iori calmly put away the phone. "Nothing. Just another soul lost in this world."
(???)
Shiro internally gave up.
Why had he obediently left his phone outside? Couldn't Iori at least pretend to be subtle about it?
He wanted to get Iori's attention—if that phone worked, they still had hope!
But just then, the annoying foreign professor wandered nearby. He'd have to wait for another chance.
Fwoosh~
A piece of paper fluttered, catching the blond professor's attention.
Σ(?д?|||)‼
Shiro looked across the aisle at Fujiwara in disbelief.
What the heck was that guy doing?! Why would he open his shirt collar right when the professor walked past?! Unless that guy's blind, there's no way he'd miss that!
Just as expected, the professor instantly spotted and grabbed the cheat sheet, staring at Fujiwara.
"What's… this?"
His awkward Japanese sent a wave of pressure over the students around him.
At that moment, without any communication, the six of them instantly pointed straight at Fujiwara!
{{(°△°;")}}!
"I thought we agreed to stick together?!!"
Fujiwara stared in disbelief. Was their brotherhood really weaker than an exam score?!
…
"FAIL."
The doomed exam paper fluttered onto the now-colorless Fujiwara.
In that moment, he lost more than just credit… he lost the brotherly bonds he thought were strong.
"Man, looks like everyone did pretty badly."
The professor glanced around with disappointment. He'd actually seen all their little tricks.
"Well then, let's give out some bonus questions."
The moment he said that, the room erupted in cheers. In that instant, the foreign professor transformed into everyone's beloved uncle from abroad!
Shiro remained calm, unaffected by the excitement around him…
Bonus questions?
For someone who hadn't attended a single class, there was no such thing as a bonus question.
Especially in a foreign language class!
In his past life, English had been the same. Shiro could never tell if an English test was hard or not—it all looked like an alien language.
"From now, I'll say things from the textbook. Just translate them into German and write on the back of the test."
Bonus time!
Iori and the others cheered. Compared to the main test, this was a godsend!
Even if they were terrible, surely they could translate one or two phrases right!
Shiro continued slacking off. He planned to wait for Kitahara and the others to come through.
The odds were slim—but not zero!
Nothing is impossible with the right motivation!
"First question: Rheumatic heart disease!"
"..."
The room fell silent.
Did they really cover this in class?! That was way too technical!
Someone please explain to the professor what bonus question means!
Iori and Kohei screamed internally. There was no way they could write this! Shouldn't this be given to German majors?
"Second question: A naked man holding a banana."
m9( ｀д′ )!!!!
Iori nearly snapped his pen in rage. He racked his tiny brain and swore—that was NEVER in any textbook!
What kind of teacher puts something like that in the materials?! Should he introduce him to the gay bar down the street? The pervert sitting behind him could take him right there!
...Wait a second!
While ranting internally, Iori heard the sound of a pen scratching paper behind him.
He turned around in horror—and sure enough, Shiro was writing furiously on his test!
'You crazy bastard, why do you know this one?!'
Their telepathic link reconnected—
'Huh? It's the Banana Man! Isn't that someone you'd memorize in every language?!'
Shiro replied innocently, and Iori saw written on his paper the one and only German word he knew,
"Bananenmann." (Banana Man)
!!!
What the hell?! Was this guy seriously famous or something?!
Iori stared at Shiro's confident face, doubting reality. Was he disconnected from modern times?
Whatever! This wasn't the time to question that!
Iori shook his head to clear his thoughts. Right or wrong—just copy it!
But as he prepared to write, a large hand slammed down on his head. That awkward Japanese rang out by his ear.
"Final question... James Thomas!"
"..."
"Get outta here! That's a proper noun!"
"Isn't that English?!"
"Did you even want us to pass?!"
Everyone broke down. This foreign professor clearly never intended to give them a real chance!
…
Exam Over — Papers Graded On the Spot
Shiro grinned at the six defeated idiots. Their scores were all in the teens or twenties. Though he hadn't understood a single question, his years of experience had earned him a proud 60 points!
That was enough to pass and prove the difference in level between him and those morons!
"Well, everyone's scores were pretty bad, so 10 points will be a pass this time. 20 points will be considered good."
With that, the teacher's words brought the defeated back to life. Holding their graded tests, they screamed like cavemen rediscovering fire.
"..."
Tch!
Shiro clicked his tongue. What kind of luck was that? Passing with just ten points!
Back in his hometown, that'd get you kicked out of the house!
But… sometimes, joy comes with a catch. Iori and the others noticed an extra page on the back of their tests.
Clear as day, it read:
"Suspected of cheating. Retake required! Come see me after class."
"AAAAAHHHHH DAMN IT!!!!"
The six howled in despair, joy flipping to sorrow in an instant!
"Tsk tsk tsk, what a shame~"
Shiro gloated with his score sheet. In the end, only he and Chisa—the true elite—had passed among the Eight Smack!
A hand landed on Shiro's shoulder. Before he could turn, a familiar transparent cheat sheet appeared before his eyes.
That awkward Japanese again—
"Well, Shiro-kun, in all my years of teaching, you're the first student bold enough to submit a cheat sheet along with your test. Come on, let's have a little chat in my office."
{{(°△°;")}}!
Shiro was dumbfounded. His mind raced.
He… he did put the cheat sheet inside the test at the end!!!
AAAAAHHHH!!!!
As expected—exams can all go to hell!!
Shiro clutched his face in despair.
In the end… it wasn't seven who fell from heaven.
From the Eight only Chisa made it out alive!
83 points~
.....................…..
Ding dong dong—make-up exam over~
With the sound of the bell marking the end of the test, the seven-member make-up exam squad let out a collective sigh of relief.
That was terrifying. Absolutely terrifying!
The seven of them exchanged glances, all wearing looks of utter exhaustion and panda-like eye bags.
"Why… what the hell was that foreign guy thinking? Why on earth is the make-up exam the day after the actual test?!"
Yamamoto's face twitched uncontrollably.
After 20 years of academic life, it was the first time he had experienced a make-up test immediately after the final exam!
"I heard it's because some idiot disrespected that foreigner and handed in a cheat sheet on purpose. After that, to stop us from cheating again, he moved the make-up exam up…"
Iori looked completely drained—he hadn't slept a wink last night.
What the hell is wrong with that foreign guy's brain?! How is anyone supposed to review an entire subject overnight? This was clearly a trap, like they wanted them to cheat so they could fail the course!
And the bastard who turned in the cheat sheet—what the hell was he thinking?!
Whoever it is… better pray we never find out!
While the others were fuming with exhaustion and rage, Shiro silently thanked that foreigner in his heart.
Looks like he unknowingly dodged a life-or-death situation…
"Ugh, at this rate, I won't have the energy to go to Okinawa. My sweet little mermaid (´д｀)"
Kouhei moaned dejectedly. He felt like his soul had been sucked out—no amount of Okinawa sunshine could bring him back to life.
"…Why are you linking Okinawa with mythical creatures again?"
"There's still some time before the holidays, right?"
The four outsiders looked at the PaB trio with disbelief. They didn't know why, but… those three always seemed to live life on a whole other level.
"Hey, you three—since we all just finished the make-up exam, how about we go have a drink to celebrate?"
Yamamoto suggested, and although they were all exhausted, the idea of a post-test celebration was still tempting.
"Drinking?!" ×3
The moment that word came out, the three of them basically sprang back to life, their eyes gleaming. Because of the exam, their club activities had been on hold, after all!
"…Weren't you guys dead tired just now?"
The four outsiders were frozen in place. Had they accidentally flipped some kind of switch?
"If that's the plan, then it's decided. Let's go to Kamishiro's place."
"True, true. Let's just head to Kamishiro's."
"OK! To Kamishiro's place!"
"Hehe, I've been waiting for this day."
"No problem, I'll lead the way!"
"Should I tell Azusa-senpai to whip up some snacks or something?"
?!!?!
{{(°△°;")}}!
Shiro looked at the six of them in horror. Why had they suddenly decided this?! Are we even that close?! Is this seriously okay?!
And Kouhei and Iori, those traitors—why did Azusa-nee ever tell them where he lived?!
If those four animals find out, he's doomed!
"Kitahara-kun, just now you mentioned Azusa-senpai—is she that older-sister-type upperclassman? Tell me more about those snacks."
Shiro hadn't even had time to refuse before Yamamoto started pulling Iori aside for more details.
They were so close to finding out!!!
Shiro immediately pulled off an over-the-shoulder throw and launched Iori away, then nervously rubbed his head and laughed,
"Ahahaha, Kitahara's just joking! There's no way I'd make Senpai cook for us! Also—why are we even going to my place? It's way shabbier than you think…"
I absolutely can't let these guys come over!
There are certain "activities" that have to happen at night!
WHAM!
Yamamoto and Nojima's demon-like faces loomed in front of him.
"Kamishiro-kun… now that you're part of our circle, we should all be honest with each other."
"We've been hearing quite a few glorious tales about you lately."
Nojima held up his phone in front of Shiro. On the screen was the school forum, and the #1 trending post was…
"SHOCKING! First-year student hosts chaotic house parties and hits on girls nonstop! Though his name is unknown, he's described as a handsome guy with slanted eyes!"
Kudou!!!
The second Shiro saw that post, he knew who was behind it. That bastard was getting revenge!
This post reads like a smutty novel—no way they don't know who the main character is!
Even if he had such desires, there's no way he'd hold a party in his own house, right?!
He needed to explain himself—urgently!
But then…
Looking at those demonic faces, Shiro suddenly felt like explanations were pointless.
These guys were already consumed by jealousy!
There was only one option left—find a scapegoat!
Nothing a good scapegoat can't fix!
Shiro lowered his head, hiding his expression in the shadows.
"You guys… you've been deceived!"
Yamamoto and Nojima paused, sensing something shift in Shiro's aura. Was there a twist?
He broke free from their grip, eyes sharp, and pointed at Mitarai.
"Slanted eyes! Pretty face! It's clearly Mitarai! Even if we both have squinty eyes, mine are handsome squinty eyes!"
Scapegoat, your time has come!
"..."
Everyone's face turned dark. Come on—the post obviously meant you! After that forum thread, everyone on campus knows you're a playboy!
And now you're throwing your friend under the bus?! For real?!
BAM!
Yamamoto and Nojima, faces pitch-black, grabbed Shiro again.
"Kamishiro-kun, give it up. Our friendship with Mitarai can't be shaken!"
Σ(?д?|||)??!
Shiro stared at them in disbelief.
Wait… could he have been wrong?
Are these guys actually… serious about their bromance?
He felt a twinge of guilt. Was it really that low of him to try and turn them against each other?
"…We were studying at Mitarai's place last night. We've already inspected his home!"
Nojima adjusted his glasses, his eyes shining with terrifying wisdom.
"..."
(;´Д｀)
Shiro swore—he would never trust any of them again. These guys were certified garbage human beings!!!
"Kamishiro-kun! I trust you understand what this means!"
Gulp…
Looking around at the group now wielding shovels, Shiro swallowed hard.
It seemed… he no longer had the right to refuse.
I have to get Azusa-nee out of the house!!!
If they find out, I'm dead meat!!!
How the hell did I end up surrounded by people like this?!
…
.....................…..
Diving Shop
Azusa stretched lazily as she stepped out of Nanaka's room.
Even though it was already the afternoon, and waking up this late was a bit shameful… there really was no helping it. Nanaka's bed was way too comfy, and the whole place was filled with her scent~
Who in their right mind could resist that?!
"You're up, Azusa. Here, have some water~"
An angelic smile greeted her, immediately reminding Azusa of the dream she'd just had—one where she, Shiro, and Nanaka had a very wonderful time together~
If it weren't for her iron self-control, Nanaka's bedsheets would've been in serious danger.
Crap! She had to stop thinking about it! If she kept it up, her phantom limb was going to get way too excited!
Azusa forced herself to act natural as she took the glass of water Nanaka handed her.
She'd worked so hard to maintain this relationship at its current level—she couldn't let it all go to waste just because of some small phantom limb excitement.
Damn it! Why couldn't she hypnotize people like the protagonists in her collection? When would she get her hands on a time-stopping watch?!
Nanaka gazed at her kindly, completely oblivious to Azusa's inner turmoil. If anything, the only thing she noticed was… well, that Azusa was properly dressed for once~
"Well… what time is it? If there's no party today, I'll head back."
Azusa was uncharacteristically shy.
Mostly because, in her dream, she and Shiro had absolutely wrecked Nanaka. Even if it was just a dream, it felt kind of awkward now that she was standing right in front of her…
"Huh? You're heading back already? Oh right, Shiro said there've been perverts spotted near your place. He's dealing with it now and asked me to let you stay the night here."
Nanaka's face was filled with concern—clearly worried about their safety.
(′｀;)?
Perverts?
What kind of pervert could possibly be worse than Shiro?
Azusa was totally confused. Their place had one of the highest safety ratings in the area. She'd been living there all this time and never noticed any creeps. What the hell was Shiro up to again?
"Well, it's fine. I'll just contact Toki and Bukki."
Even if she suspected Shiro was pulling something, better to play it safe. With Toki and Bukki around, any pervert was doomed from the start.
Though… if this was one of Shiro's setups—
Sorry, Shiru! Azusa-nee's phantom limb's a bit out of control today, but I'll definitely seize the next opportunity!
Shiro's House
Shiro calmly tidied up his room. With Azusa safely out of the house, he had nothing to fear!
Azusa was probably clinging to Nanaka's waist right now, grateful for his help. In a way, you could say he was acting as her wingman~
Azusa was also the only girl who knew where he lived. Usually, whenever he was up to no good, he'd go to a hotel.
If he brought girls back home every time… one day one of them might go full yandere and slice him to pieces!
As for Kiyoko… well, that was an accident. And she didn't even know his exact room.
If she did come knocking, he'd just show her what it meant to be the prey in a predator's den!
Ding dong~
The doorbell rang. Shiro got up with a sigh.
Honestly, he really didn't want this bunch of idiots coming over.
Not because of cleaning or OCD or anything like that—it was just… if any girl asked them where he lived, these bastards would rat him out without hesitation!
Creak~
There was nothing to fear anymore. All his incriminating stuff had been locked up under the bed and sealed off with a wooden board. Right now, his room was nothing more than a regular college guy's place—just like that dumbass Kitahara had imagined!
"Yo, good evening~"
"We brought snacks and drinks~"
As the door opened, six smiling faces appeared before Shiro.
"..."
If Shiro didn't know their true motives, he might've actually mistaken them for friendly visitors…
"Sigh… well, thanks for coming. Come on in."
What else could he do? It was already too late to stop it.
"Haha, don't mind if we do!"
Led by Iori, the six guys stepped into Shiro's room. For all of them, including Iori and Kohei—it was their first time here.
And, well…
Aside from the wall of books and a cabinet full of figures, the rest looked just like a normal guy's room…
"You totally did it on purpose last time, didn't you?!"
The moment he stepped inside, Iori pounced on Shiro like a demon, grabbing his collar in front of the confused eyes of the 'outsider' four-man group.
Shiro's face twitched. Why was this idiot still hung up on something that happened so long ago?!
"You know how it is… rooms get cleaned eventually…"
"Damn you!!!"
Their intimate struggle left the four outsiders baffled. They looked to Kohei for answers.
"What's with those two? We feel totally left out here."
"Just a couple of idiots having idiot banter… Wait—hold on! Is that Aqua?!"
Kohei suddenly zoomed over to Shiro's figure cabinet—where Aqua stood with a dumb expression, holding down her skirt!
And right next to her were tons of other anime figures—even limited editions from Eva and Lalako! There were even autographs from voice actors!!!
Not to mention… all the shelves were lined with high-quality light novels—signed editions!
While this room didn't quite match his own… it was clearly a true otaku's sanctuary! A kindred spirit, right next to him?!
"Shiro! You're a fellow otaku?! And you've collected this much already?! Damn it, how did you even get that Eva VA's autograph?!"
"Here! Take this money! Let me at least touch the Lalako limited edition!"
Kohei immediately joined the brawl between Shiro and Iori, dropping to one knee like a noble offering tribute—presenting the 30,000 yen he had on him.
He was even prepared to run to the bank if it wasn't enough!
"You bastard! I'm not an otaku like you—I'm a normie, okay?! You know, the type surrounded by girls?! And where exactly are you trying to touch on that Lalako figure, huh?! With that 30k, you could graduate in real life already!"
"Out of the way, Kohei! I've got a score to settle with this piece of trash!"
"Shirou! Don't you dare hurt my fellow otaku!"
"Damn it, what the hell are you guys even here for?!"
"..."
The four outsider guys just stood there silently, snacks and drinks still in hand.
They'd only been in the room for less than a minute…
Did these three idiots even remember the real reason they came here today?!
Also, what the hell were they even fighting about anymore?!
＼(`Δ')／
.....................…..
"Cheers!"
"To celebrating our success in passing the make-up exams!"
Seven people raised their beers and shouted joyfully—nothing tastes better than a beer after passing an exam!
"Well, I don't really get it, but it's best if everyone stays this harmonious like now~"
Yamamoto sipped his beer with a satisfied expression. Harmony between brothers was the most important thing.
"...Why are you all acting like this is your home already?"
Shiro looked at the carefree group and felt a headache coming on. Were these guys really Japanese?
"(.?﹃?.) Hehehe, Lalako... my precious Lalako…"
With a perverted grin, Kohei hugged Shiro's limited edition Lalako figure like a creep. His wish had been fulfilled.
Of course... Shiro still accepted that 30,000 yen Kohei had handed over!
After all, he couldn't let Kohei's sincerity go to waste!
Shiro was seriously considering selling that Lalako figure to Kohei. He'd definitely get a high price!
At the same time, he felt the need to once again clarify—he was not an otaku. The figures were just a hobby, the light novels were work-related—he was a normie! A proper extrovert! Surrounded by girls!
"Still, I really didn't expect it, Kamishiro-kun… Your place is so clean and tidy. Looks like it's barely lived in."
Nojima adjusted his glasses, clearly suspicious. It was way too neat. Some things didn't add up—like that unopened nightstand still wrapped in plastic… even though it was already being used as a nightstand.
"..."
Shiro followed his gaze and fell silent. Nojima wasn't entirely wrong, he really didn't spend much time here.
It was either a party or the motel. He wasn't home much in a week. He had bought that nightstand but had been too tired to open it, and then realized… he didn't even need to.
"Hahaha, I just kinda forgot about it. I'll open it later."
"No need to be so serious, Nojima. Have you forgotten our real purpose for being here?
We're here to celebrate passing our make-up exams! Let's leave the irrelevant stuff aside!"
"Yamamoto…"
Nojima looked at Yamamoto, stunned. Had this guy already gotten drunk and started talking nonsense?!
Wasn't their purpose crystal clear from the beginning?!
Even Shiro stared in disbelief. He was already surprised they hadn't done a full inspection of his place. And now they were saying stuff like this?
Was the director holding the wrong script? Were they about to shout "cut" after finding the problem?
"Here, Kamishiro-kun. Try this sushi. I specially bought it from an old and reputable place."
With a brilliant smile, Yamamoto pushed a sushi box in front of Shiro. Judging by the luxurious presentation, it definitely looked classier than the others.
Gulp...
Shiro swallowed nervously.
Like hell he'd eat that!
This was the equivalent of a weasel giving New Year's greetings to a chicken!
"Eh, looks pretty good."
Before Shiro could think of a way to refuse, his stand-in had already grabbed a piece and popped it into his mouth...
Stand-in! Good job—you've earned your title!
Shiro shot Mitarai a look of approval. There was a reason they had the same character design—this was fate! His destined substitute!
He stared closely at Mitarai, watching every detail. The sushi did look delicious, and if it was safe... he really wanted a bite...
"Umami!"
Seeing his substitute unharmed, and Iori and the others also starting to eat, Shiro finally relaxed.
He took a bite of the sushi, savoring the fine, smooth texture—it was addictive. As expected of a traditional store. Compared to the flashy trash near the campus, it was no contest. Yamamoto really went all out this time.
(￣～￣)
Drinking good booze, eating great food, and occasionally listening to these idiots' nonsense—Shiro suddenly felt like gatherings like this weren't so bad after all.
That is, if the stories weren't so dumb.
Like Yamamoto kneeling on both knees every time he confessed?! That must have traumatized the girls!
Gurgle gurgle gurgle!
Suddenly!
Shiro felt his stomach churn violently. Something was surging at full force out his back end!
He curled up, eyes wide, staring at the now-empty sushi box—was it poisoned?!
But how?! The others were fine...
He looked up—and saw six demonic grins staring back.
"Yo~ Kamishiro-kun, what's wrong? Did you maybe eat a little too much~?"
These bastards!!!
Shiro's eyes widened. It was clearly a premeditated act!
Even Iori and Kohei had sided with them!
Especially Kohei! How could he do this while still hugging the Lalako figure?!
"Why... why are you all fine...?"
Shiro groaned in pain. He couldn't hold on much longer, but before he died he wanted to know the truth. He had only eaten one piece out of caution!
Clap!
Yamamoto patted Shiro on the shoulder with a look of pity,
"Kamishiro-kun, sometimes you can't just look at appearances. You may lead us in other areas, but your intelligence's still lagging behind."
"Take a look at your chopsticks."
Shiro looked down—and spotted a faint white powder residue on his chopsticks.
?!!
He was horrified—these bastards rigged the chopsticks from the start!
These scumbags! And they had pretended to be so righteous earlier!
"Kamishiro, go now! The toilet is calling your name. If you don't go, I will~ I've been needing to take a leak too~"
Iori grinned wickedly, starting to pull his pants down as he spoke.
"YOU BASTARD!"
Shiro couldn't take it anymore. He shoved Iori aside and sprinted to the toilet like a track star.
These guys weren't even trying to hide their crimes! Could he call the police and report a home invasion at this point?!
"..."
Watching Shiro vanish, the six remaining guys lowered their heads, eerie grins spreading across their faces.
"So, everyone... you still remember our mission, right?"
Yamamoto sneered, the jealousy in his heart overflowing.
"Of course, Yamamoto-kun. Forgive me for ever doubting you—you really had a plan."
Nojima pushed up his glasses, his feel good loser soul igniting.
"Hmph, right. This house doesn't need a second smug pretty boy."
"That damn face of his deserves to sink to the bottom of the sea!"
As the four burned with vengeful flames, Iori suddenly felt extremely relieved it wasn't his house they were trashing...
"Well then, gentlemen—shall we begin?!"
"Ohhh!!!"
...
.....................…..
Bathroom
Shiro stared at the oversized bra in front of him and fell into deep thought...
Thankfully, he was the first to enter the bathroom—if those beasts outside had seen this, it would've been the end!
He grumbled internally, cursing his Azusa again for throwing her stuff everywhere after taking a bath!
He'd already lost count of how many times he had seen this kind of thing in the bathroom.
Seriously, should this be in here? If not in the washing machine, at least in the laundry basket, right?
"Sigh…"
He let out a sigh.
Now wasn't the time to be thinking about such things. He didn't even care about the six beasts outside anymore. As long as they didn't find anything incriminating and returned the room to its original state, it was fine.
Now!
He had to transcend his limits in the bathroom!!!
"Damn it! Why the hell is there nothing here?!"
Yamamoto slammed the table. They had rushed over precisely to stop Shiro from destroying evidence!
"It's just a regular otaku's room!"
The others looked equally defeated. The rental apartment was small to begin with, and they'd already searched the closets and everything else—nothing!
They even helped reassemble the guy's nightstand together!
"I think something's off."
A voice lit up the room with hope. Everyone turned hungrily toward Kohei—did he find something?
"This Aqua figure's clothes… they can come off!"
Kohei was visibly excited as he showed them his discovery, nose bleeding from youthful passion!
(???)
He's hopeless!
This hardcore otaku is beyond saving!
The rest turned away, ignoring Kohei who was lost in his own world, and resumed their "investigation."
Iori was sweating nervously as he watched the four flipping the room upside down.
These guys clearly weren't here to check if Kamishiro had a party.
They were here to prove he did, to find the evidence and convict him!
Honestly, Iori thought they could just skip the whole "finding evidence" part—after all, they'd already locked up the guy who lived here in the bathroom!
"Damn it!"
A frustrated Yamamoto collapsed onto the floor. Iori even thought he saw tears at the corners of his eyes.
He really wanted to find evidence!
"Um... is it possible it was all just a rumor?"
Said the honest Fujiwara.
They had searched this far, and honestly, the room didn't look like a party had happened at all. Even the bedsheets in the closet were clean.
"No way! Absolutely not! We're talking about Kamishiro Shiro—the most popular freshman in school! That face alone can seduce countless older girls!
I can feel it! That guy… that guy gives off an aura of a total scumbag! An aura even stronger than Mitarai's!
And those eyes… there's no way he's a virgin!
Besides, that post was so detailed—it has to be real! Maybe the person who posted it even attended the party!"
Yamamoto shouted with tears streaming down his face, ready to tear Shiro limb from limb. At this moment, his name was Jealousy!
"..."
Iori was speechless. Now he was sure—these guys saw a post, believed it, and then came looking for evidence.
Sure, that scumbag probably isn't a virgin… but Kamishiro's always squinting. How the hell did Yamamoto read his "eyes"?!
And what kind of party guest would post something like that online anyway?!
Sobered by alcohol, Iori calmly analyzed everything.
He had figured it all out—these guys were driven purely by jealousy. They were just looking for a way to convict Kamishiro out of spite.
Very well. He approved.
Shiro really is scum. Why did that guy already graduate from sex anyway?!
"Damn it!"
Thud!
Nojima punched the bed in frustration. A wooden board around the bed collapsed, revealing a pitch-black space underneath.
The air froze. All six faces twisted into creepy smiles fit to haunt children's dreams.
"Soga, Kamishiro's bed was surrounded by wood. I thought he didn't even have space under the bed."
"Haha, yeah. We almost missed it."
"This isn't some horror story, right? No reason to block the underside unless..."
"Unless there's something to hide…"
"..."
They exchanged knowing smiles.
"URA!!!"
They yanked up all the boards around the bed.
"Let's see what treasures this scumbag is hiding!"
Iori dove under first and pulled out a box. The others weren't far behind, each crawling under to search.
In the end—
They found six boxes of varying sizes.
The largest was about half the size of a person. The smallest could fit in the palm of a hand.
"I'll go first!"
Fujiwara wore a twisted grin and picked the biggest box—similar to the one he used to store his "girlfriend" at home. Would this high-level scumbag have something similar?
"Let's witness the sins!"
Without hesitation, Fujiwara opened the box, revealing—
Scantily clad female cosplay outfits! Bunny girl, cat ears, witch… All the sexy anime classics were here, in greater variety than most stores!
"Kamishiro!!!"
Everyone's eyes turned bloodshot. These were obviously women's cosplay outfits!
Damn it! While they were still virgins, this scumbag was already this deep into degeneracy?!
"Got it all written down, Nojima?!"
"Of course! This is sin number one!"
Nojima's veins bulged as he struggled to contain his rage.
"Next!"
Mitarai opened his box, just slightly smaller than Fujiwara's.
It was full of women's clothing and makeup.
The four began to hyperventilate again.
Iori and Kohei's expressions darkened—they recognized those clothes. They were Azusa's. She lived next door, so it was technically normal for her clothes to be here, but...
Normal, my ass!!!
Why were so many of her clothes in this bastard's room?! What were they doing at night?!
Yamamoto silently picked up a lipstick that rolled to the floor, his face full of heartbreak. "Hey… you guys think this is a suppository?"
!!!
A tear rolled down Nojima's cheek. What kind of trauma makes someone mistake lipstick for a suppository?!
Sin number two!
"My turn…"
Yamamoto took a deep breath. He could already hear things clinking around in the box.
"Time to pass the death sentence!"
He opened it.
Pink balls. Pink handcuffs. Black whips. Red candles…
The kinds of props only seen in BDSM films.
This kind of advanced gear caused a critical hit to their virgin hearts—far worse than cosplay outfits!
"..."